


make it to me

by figmentof



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Allusion to vomitting, Alternate Universe - Zombie Apocalypse, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, M/M, Mentions of Violence, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Panicked Confessions, Post-Zombie Apocalypse, SMS based dialogue, Slow Burn, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, Texting, brief descriptions of gore, how to kill a zombie 101, lots of flirting, maybe too much flirting, suicide ideation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-25
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:14:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 25,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23296087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/figmentof/pseuds/figmentof
Summary: Alone in the outskirts of Rochester, New York trying his damn best to survive a fucking zombie outbreak; David finds a phone.
Relationships: Patrick Brewer/David Rose
Comments: 339
Kudos: 431





	1. May 17 2020

**Author's Note:**

> The title is from Make It to Me by Sam Smith.
> 
> Please do note the tags! I will put as many warnings as needed in the tags with every update. Also, make sure to have the creator style turned on so the format won't look wonky.
> 
> Note: I purposely designed the fic to look like an actual phone screen so you will need to scroll through the texts!
> 
> A lot of love was put into creating this fic so I hope you enjoy it as much as I have making it!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The world ends on the 14th of April.

**10:13 PM** **98%**

**〈**

Patrick 〉

**March 29** 9:23 PM

 **Rachel:** You left so suddenly and I don’t know what I’ve done wrong

 **Rachel:** I know you said it was over and that you needed a change

 **Rachel:** But what should I have done differently?

  


**April 3** 11:49 AM

 **Patrick:** I told you, you did nothing wrong

 **Patrick:** I just need to figure myself out, okay?

 **Patrick:** Please understand that I just had to escape

 **Rachel:** I'm trying to

  


**April 5** 5:33 PM

 **Rachel:** Went by the shelter again today

 **Rachel:** The dog we saw last time got adopted!

 **Rachel:** I heard his new family has two other dogs so he has siblings

 **Rachel:** He’s really happy and loved

  


**April 10** 9:12 AM

 **Rachel:** Driving down to NYC with some friends, remember Sarah? She got us some tickets to a show

 **Rachel:** I keep hoping that I’d bump into you whenever we stop somewhere

 **Rachel:** I’d like to think I’d be able to find you eventually

 **Rachel:** Hope you’re doing well, wherever you are

  


**April 12** 3:27 AM

 **Rachel:** I miss you

  


**April 14** 1:59 PM

 **Rachel:** Where are you? Have you seen the news?

 **Rachel:** Patrick, please PLEASE answer your phone

  
  


**Today** 9:38 PM

 **David:** alright i’ve had this phone for two whole days

 **David:** i tried not to scroll too far up out of respect for this poor girl

 **David:** i sincerely hope the owner of this phone is safe

 **David:** judging by the lack of response on your end

 **David:** either she's with you or she managed to go elsewhere

  


**Today** 10:12 PM

 **David:** if she’s with you though

 **David:** i hope she realizes she deserves better

Delivered

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, this does takes place in current time and no, it wasn't intentional. I wrote/drafted this way before the world went to shit with an actual pandemic. Also the timeline of everything is moved up but everyone's approximately the age they were in S3.


	2. May 18 2020

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "matching coat squad goals my ass"

**9:09 PM** **74%**

**〈**

Patrick 〉

**Today** 12:03 AM

 **David:** well shit that actually got sent out huh

 **David:** i’m astonished mobile data still works

 **David:** it’s a good thing you’re probably never gonna read this then

  


**Today** 1:29 PM

 **David:** youtube sure is helpful during a zombie apocalypse

 **David:** who knew all those mock zombie survival videos done for fun would actually be of use

 **David:**....ended up watching cat videos

 **David:** i don’t even like cats

  


**Today** 3:45 PM

 **David:** oddly documenting my thoughts here seem to be a lot more helpful than writing in the notes app

 **David:** less lonely

 **David:** actually still pretty fucking pathetic but whatever

 **David:** not the first time that i’ve talked to myself in a text to someone else

 **David:** though the likelihood of you actively ghosting me is less likely

 **David:** but judging by how you weren’t responding to the girl this phone belongs to, you’re probably a pro at that

 **David:** fuck

 **David:** i think there’s a gaggle of them coming, i can hear them outside

 **David:** this place was nice but g2g

  


**Today** 6:12 PM

 **David:** saw one of my “friends" out there, still in her Burberry coat

 **David:** what a way to go, the bottom half of your face dripping down a 2k trench coat

 **David:** reminds me, i think we got it together last year? matching coat squad goals my ass

 **David:** the blood mixed with the taupe is ugly as all hell

 **David:** put it in the MoMA and watch people fawn over blood on cloth

 **David:** maybe then she can pay me back the 20 grand i spent on her stupid garbage art installation

  


**Today** 9:07 PM

 **David:** i kinda want to take the bat i found on the lawn and go back to smash her head in

 **David:** the idea of it sounds more appealing than actually doing it

 **David:** i’ll just pretend i did it

Delivered

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm emotionally distraught from today's ep (The Pitch) so I'm posting two chapters ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


	3. May 19 2020

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "emotional support mall pretzel"

**6:15 PM** **53%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 2:23 PM

 **David:** the only thing keeping me from getting mutilated is that i’m wearing timberlands i managed to jack from famous footwear

 **David:** me, stealing shoes. what has this world come to

 **David:** i’m not gonna get caught dead wearing old navy mixed with timberlands, not even in this hellscape

 **David:** lest i get mistaken for some try hard hick douche omfg imagine

  


**Today** 2:41 PM

 **David:** those b-movies that have zombies roaming around empty shopping malls are unrealistic

 **David:** but i’m no less creeped the fuck out. it’s noon ffs why is it so creepy in here

  


**Today** 3:29 PM

 **David:** saw a pretzel stand. shame the pretzels were all covered in mold. what i wouldn’t give to have a mall pretzel right now

 **David:** emotional support mall pretzel

  


**Today** 4:37 PM

 **David:** is my incorrectly massive mountaineering backpack full of stuff needed for survival? unfortunately yes

 **David:** does that include as many packs of SK-II eye masks as i can physically stuff inside the small compartments?

 **David:** oh hell yeah

  


**Today** 6:14 PM

 **David:** i can’t believe i actually got a craving for pizza when i walked past sbarro

 **David:** i don’t recognize myself anymore

 **David:** i draw the line at mall pretzels. i won’t do mall pizza

 **David:** artisanal is where it’s at

 **David:** though if i had a slice in front of me i might lose the fight

 **David:** okay i’d definitely lose the fight

 **David:** my standards left me the minute i had to start eating baked beans and canned foods

Delivered

  



	4. May 20 2020

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "they have a fucking WINE FRIDGE"

**11:59 PM** **13%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 12:36 PM

 **David:** lucky me. people were in such a rush to escape that several houses are unlocked

 **David:** so much for these expensive home security systems, can’t defend against zombies lol

 **David:** i have a whole block of houses to choose from

 **David:** the minimalist one at the far end of the street would’ve been my go-to had times been different

  


**Today** 1:09 PM

 **David:** hmm homey in a very suburban way but i’m not complaining

 **David:** thank god this family bought in bulk

 **David:** i can’t believe i’m appreciative of Costco

  


**Today** 4:28 PM

 **David:** inhaled a bag of cheese puffs in the least attractive way possible

 **David:** my trainer would be so upset with me if he knew

 **David:** too bad he’s not here to stop me with his big, muscular arms

  


**Today** 6:51 PM

 **David:** they have a fucking WINE FRIDGE

 **David:** if any zombies smell me and eat me, at least i’ll die passed out drunk and won’t feel a thing

 **David:** wish me luck lol

**Read** , 11:42 PM

  



	5. May 21 2020

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "mmmmmmmm i can’t re ad the screen it’s so bLurry?????"

**3:19 AM** **72%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 1:21 AM

 **David:** u kno what i really wish i could just walk outside and scream

 **David:** be the center of attention one last time

 **David:** give those zombie fucks a fucking snack

 **David:** tho i’m more of a feast lbr hahahahaha

 **David:** i’m really gonna die out all alone here aren’t i

  


**Today** 2:02 AM

 **David:** mmmmmmmm i can’t re ad the screen it’s so bLurry????? it’s on dark mode yet i can’t see shit?????

 **David:** is this house LEaking why is my face so wet did i pick a shitty house

  


**Today** 2:46 AM

 **Patrick:** I don’t think the undead would enjoy wine-infused human

 **Patrick:** …You’re not actually drunk enough to walk outside and deliver yourself to them, are you?

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posting two chapters today since 1. 6x12 already gave us a cliffhanger so I'm not gonna do that to y'all and 2. I'm pretty sure I'm gonna be rendered an absolute mess by this week's episode that I (and probably the rest of us) won't be able to function on Wednesday. So no update this Wednesday~


	6. May 22 2020

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "fuck."

**11:52 PM** **51%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 4:29 PM

 **David:** well fuck me sideways

  


**Today** 6:27 PM

 **Patrick:** Hello to you too

 **Patrick:** Relieved to know you didn’t actually drunkenly give yourself over to a horde

  


**Today** 6:41 PM

 **David:** are you Patrick?

  


**Today** 7:02 PM

 **Patrick:** Last I checked this is my phone

 **Patrick:** Were you expecting someone else?

  


**Today** 7:13 PM

 **David:** sure wish i was talking to satan right now!!!

 **David:** to tell him i arrived in hell by death of embarrassment

 **David:** also fyi offering myself to zombies wouldn’t be the stupidest thing i’ve done drunk

  


**Today** 7:16 PM

 **Patrick:** I feel like I’ll regret asking what possibly could be more stupid than that

  


**Today** 7:23 PM

 **David:** wouldn’t you like to know

  


**Today** 7:36 PM

 **David:** so did i annoy you enough for you to finally pick up your phone and respond to me or

  


**Today** 7:43 PM

 **Patrick:** Well no. I had my phone off because I was out on a week long scouting mission

 **Patrick:** Though I really wasn’t prepared for the way my phone started buzzing nonstop when I turned it back on

  


**Today** 7:51 PM

 **David:** you only read my drunk texts right

  


**Today** 7:54 PM

 **Patrick:** Oh no I scrolled all the way back to the first message you sent me

 **Patrick:** I see I’ve made a good first impression

  


**Today** 7:57 PM

 **David:** fuck.

  


**Today** 8:04 PM

 **Patrick:** Don’t know how far up you’ve read

 **Patrick:** But I suppose I deserved some of that hostility

  


**Today** 8:11 PM

 **Patrick:** Your messages were very entertaining though

 **Patrick:** My friends said it made their evening when I read it to them

  


**Today** 8:14 PM

 **David:** oh you deserved all of my hostility alright

  


**Today** 8:19 PM

 **Patrick:** I’m kidding about the showing my friends part, actually

 **Patrick:** Wouldn’t do that to you

  


**Today** 8:23 PM

 **David:** sure you wouldn't

  


**Today** 8:30 PM

 **Patrick:** Though Ronnie did tell me to put my vibrator away

 **Patrick:** There was so much buzzing

  


**Today** 8:33 PM

 **David:** oh my god

  


**Today** 8:40 PM

 **Patrick:** Where are you?

  


**Today** 8:42 PM

 **David:** this reminds me of the old a/s/l omegle days

  


**Today** 8:47 PM

 **Patrick:** I didn’t go on omegle

 **Patrick:** Considering the situation right now I think I’m asking a valid question though?

  


**Today** 8:50 PM

 **David:** you didn’t play around omegle? what sort of organism are you??

 **David:** i’m somewhere in the suburbs of Rochester, if you really want to know

  


**Today** 8:56 PM

 **Patrick:** I was busy with varsity baseball and guitar lessons

 **Patrick:** Rochester, New York? So you’re near Toronto

  


**Today** 9:00 PM

 **David:** oh he's a cultured jock

 **David:** does it matter where i am?

  


**Today** 9:02 PM

 **Patrick:** It kind of does actually. You’re a bit of a distance away from Schitt’s Creek, but it’s manageable

 **Patrick:** Our town is safe, one of the few towns that hasn't gotten infested or wrecked

  


**Today** 9:06 PM

 **David:** wait Schitt’s Creek? why does that sound familiar

  


**Today** 9:10 PM

 **Patrick:** “Up shit’s creek” and all that. Unique name

  


**Today** 9:15 PM

 **David:** …i think my dad bought that town for me as a joke a while back

  


**Today** 9:20 PM

 **Patrick:** What

  


**Patrick:** Okay, sure. It’s a locked town now so I don’t know if you still have ownership over it

 **Patrick:** Anyway, you need to come to us

  


**Today** 9:25 PM

 **David:** you don’t have to believe me lol i don’t want to believe it myself

 **David:** and thanks, but no thanks

 **David:** not sure if you’re aware mr macho, i’m not well versed in fighting zombies

 **David:** i scream in agony when i do tabata ropes

 **David:** that’s the state of my physical prowess if you’re wondering

  


**Today** 9:31 PM

 **Patrick:** You managed to stay alive this long haven’t you? It’s been what, five weeks since the outbreak, and you’re not dead

  


**Today** 9:34 PM

 **David:** hiding in unlocked houses in the suburb that i got abandoned at doesn’t exactly make me a survival expert

  


**Today** 9:39 PM

 **Patrick:** Survival isn’t about facing the undead head-on. It’s about being strategic and smart, which you are

 **Patrick:** If it’s any consolation, you just need to get within reasonable driving proximity of us

  


**Today** 9:42 PM

 **David:** driving proximity

 **David:** what are you gonna do

 **David:** come rescue me like some prince charming on a dirt bike with a machete once i do?

  


**Today** 9:45 PM

 **Patrick:** If I do that would you be willing to make your way up?

  


**Today** 9:47 PM

 **David:** nice try, but nah

 **David:** i managed for a month moving from house to house

 **David:** and if this neighborhood gets infested i’ll just go to the next one

  


**Today** 9:52 PM

 **Patrick:** But that’s no way to live and you know it

 **Patrick:** I’ll talk you through the whole trip, okay?

 **Patrick:** I’ll be here to keep you company, anything you need

  


**Today** 10:12 PM

 **David:** i’m checking google maps and there are LARGE swaths of land where there aren’t any residential areas

 **David:** i hated camping before all this shit so i’m certainly not going to sleep in the fucking woods now where i might get eaten

  


**Today** 10:19 PM

 **Patrick:** I know it’s hard to ask this of you since we just met

 **Patrick:** Could you trust me? I won’t let anything bad happen to you

  


**Today** 10:22 PM

 **David:** why are you so determined to help a stranger anyway

 **David:** it’s not like my survival is that important

  


**Today** 10:26 PM

 **Patrick:** If it were up to me, I’d drive down to Rochester and pick you up myself

 **Patrick:** If I had any say in the matter I wouldn’t allow anyone else to die alone

  


**Today** 10:40 PM

 **Patrick:** Are you still there? 

**Patrick:** Don’t tell me you got attacked while I was typing. That would be so ironic

  


**Today** 10:42 PM

 **David:** wouldn’t that be convenient

  


**Today** 10:50 PM

 **David:** so you’ll talk me through the whole way?

  


**Today** 10:51 PM

 **Patrick:** Yes

  


**Today** 10:57 PM

 **David:** i’m not sure you’re aware of what you’re signing yourself up for

  


**Today** 11:01 PM

 **Patrick:** I volunteered to be on to the scouting and rescue team the second our mayor asked

 **Patrick:** You’re not as remotely as challenging, believe me

  


**Today** 11:06 PM

 **David:** you’re either very sure of yourself or you’re an adrenaline junkie

 **David:** or you just have a weird hero complex

  


**Today** 11:08 PM

 **Patrick:** Maybe I do have a hero complex 💪🏻

  


**Today** 11:10 PM

 **David:** not sure if i vibe with this toxic masculine energy

  


**Today** 11:12 PM

 **Patrick:** You’ll live

 **Patrick:** It’s getting late. Do you want to start tomorrow?

  


**Today** 11:15 PM

 **David:** tomorrow?? keeping with that up and ‘em attitude huh

  


**Today** 11:19 PM

 **Patrick:** The weather seems good for the next couple of days

 **Patrick:** Plus the sooner you start the sooner you can get here

  


**Today** 11:22 PM

 **David:** i refuse to do any physical activity before 10 am

 **David:** zombie apocalypse or not

 **David:** so good luck preaching the whole early bird catches the worm thing to me

  


**Today** 11:26 PM

 **Patrick:** After 10 is fine

 **Patrick:** I’ll route your path tonight so you’ll only have to walk for two or so hours to start

  


**Today** 11:29 PM

 **David:** oh. okay

 **David:** thanks, Patrick

  


**Today** 11:32 PM

 **Patrick:** I never got your name, by the way

  


**Today** 11:33 PM

 **David:** David

  


**Today** 11:35 PM

 **Patrick:** Well, you’re welcome, David

 **Patrick:** Get some sleep

 **Patrick:** Got a big day ahead of us tomorrow 

  



	7. May 23 2020

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "i’ve got on spf +80 and a full stomach"

**3:36 PM** **80%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 10:12 AM

 **David:** bless whatever higher power that’s keeping electricity running

 **David:** also bless this family for having an espresso machine

  


**Today** 10:14 AM

 **Patrick:** All ready to go?

  


**Today** 10:16 AM

 **David:** mmm not quite

 **David:** i wish i could take all these things with me

  


**Today** 10:20 AM

 **Patrick:** Very chic of you to carry an espresso machine with you

 **Patrick:** Great survival tool, you can over-caffeinate the undead

 **Patrick:** Or bludgeon them over the head with it. That might actually work

  


**Today** 10:22 AM

 **David:** listen you don’t know my life or my priorities

  


**Today** 10:24 AM

 **Patrick:** I won’t be leading you straight into the wilderness... Yet

 **Patrick:** I’ll make sure you’ll find another house that has amenities soon

  


**Today** 10:27 AM

 **David:** oh how comforting that you’re eventually going to ask me to spend the night outside

 **David:** vulnerable and alone

  


**Today** 10:29 AM

 **Patrick:** Yes I aim to throw you right into the bloody jowls of the undead

  


**Today** 10:30 AM

 **David:** i can't wait

  


**Today** 10:45 AM

 **Patrick:** I don’t want to rush you David

 **Patrick:** But you should get going

  


**Today** 10:48 AM

 **David:** alright alright fine let me pack up

  


**Today** 11:06 AM

 **David:** i’ve got on spf +80 and a full stomach

 **David:** where to?

  


**Today** 11:09 AM

 **Patrick:** Follow this

 **Patrick:** If you spot a horde, let me know so I can document their direction

 **Patrick:** I’ll give you an alternative route if needed though I think you shouldn’t have much of a problem

  


**Today** 11:11 AM

 **David:** thanks

 **David:** i’ll update you in a few then, gotta focus

  


**Today** 11:48 AM

 **David:** you went with the scenic route

 **David:** very nice view

  


**Today** 11:51 AM

 **Patrick:** Of course

 **Patrick:** I don’t want your first day to be grotesque sights

  


**Today** 11:53 AM

 **David:** oh is there a horror movie route

  


**Today** 11:54 AM

 **Patrick:** Anything is a horror movie route if you really think about it

 **Patrick:** You never know what you might come across

 **Patrick:** Ghosts, serial killers, Jigsaw on his tricycle, Chucky

 **Patrick:** Oh here’s a good one: the undead

  


**Today** 12:01 PM

 **David:** okay you’re not helping

  


**Today** 12:05 PM

 **Patrick:** Don’t let the nice view distract you from the possible lurking of what could be behind the bushes

 **Patrick:** Would hate to find out you were attacked while you were taking in the greenery

  


**Today** 12:08 PM

 **David:** is it going to be a theme where you lull me into a false sense of security

 **David:** then proceed to scare the shit out of me?

  


**Today** 12:10 PM

 **Patrick:** I’m just messing with you David

**Patrick:** You’re safe

  


**Today** 12:14 PM

 **David:** yeah i’ll be the judge of that

  


**Today** 1:17 PM

 **Patrick:** Hey do you want to take a break?

  


**Today** 1:22 PM

 **David:** no? i can keep going

 **David:** walking for an hour and a half with a massive backpack isn’t favorable but i can manage

  


**Today** 1:25 PM

 **Patrick:** I wouldn’t doubt you

 **Patrick:** It’s just that something came up and I might not be able to check my phone

  


**Today** 1:27 PM

 **David:** i’ll be fine

 **David:** go be a hero or whatever

  


**Today** 1:30 PM

 **Patrick:** I’ll try to be quick

  


**Today** 1:31 PM

 **David:** i’ll still be here, walking

  


**Today** 2:19 PM

 **David:** i don’t think i’ve ever spent three hours just walking and not stopping periodically to buy things

 **David:** hit my limit

 **David:** found a nice picnic table in a park. it’s chex mix time

  


**Today** 2:36 PM

 **David:** hmm it’s getting a bit chilly

 **David:** anyway i’m gonna keep going

  


**Today** 2:42 PM

 **Patrick:** Back

**Patrick:** Do you have a coat?

  


**Today** 2:46 PM

 **David:** i wear sweaters on the reg

 **David:** but yes, i nabbed one of those puffy waterproof ones from the camping store

  


**Today** 2:48 PM

 **David:** wished i could’ve found something more complimentary to my frame though

  


**Today** 2:52 PM

 **Patrick:** Don’t know about you but I’d rather be warm than fashionable

  


**Today** 2:56 PM

 **David:** your profile pic is too small for me to tell if you look fashionable or not

 **David:** but you seem like the type to pick functional clothes

  


**Today** 3:04 PM

 **Patrick:** Is functional a synonym to ugly in your dictionary

  


**Today** 3:07 PM

 **David:** let’s just say functional and fashion don’t exactly go hand in hand

  


**Today** 3:10 PM

 **Patrick:** Speaking of my tiny profile picture

 **Patrick:** Where exactly did you find the phone?

  


**Today** 3:14 PM

 **David:** it was under the messy covers of an airbnb

 **David:** thank god i kept my charger and it’s the same model as mine

  


**Today** 3:17 PM

 **Patrick:** Rachel wasn’t lying when she said her friends move fast

  


**Today** 3:20 PM

 **David:** is she in Schitt’s Creek?

  


**Today** 3:22 PM

 **Patrick:** No, she and her friends actually drove to Ohio the minute news broke

 **Patrick:** Apparently a friend of a friend knows someone who is a part of a doomsday theorist group and prepared for this sort of event?

  


**Today** 3:26 PM

 **David:** ah

 **David:** i’m glad she’s safe

  


**Today** 3:28 PM

 **Patrick:** Yeah me too

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm gonna try and update on Wednesday but I'm not entirely sure I'll be okay lmao. I'll post about fic progress on my tumblr so if you're curious whether or not I'll update, find me there ;D


	8. May 23 2020 (cont.)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "what is this an episode of the walking dead????"

**10:11 PM** **48%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 5:51 PM

 **Patrick:** You’re doing alright I hope?

 **Patrick:** I’m a little worried since you haven’t said anything in hours

  


**Today** 5:55 PM

 **David:** i figured since you gave me a six hour trip i should just finish it

 **David:** then we can text all we want

  


**Today** 5:57 PM

 **Patrick:** Hm good idea

  


**Today** 6:14 PM

 **David:** i arrived at the checkpoint!

 **David:** bad news though: people here have everything locked

 **David:** shit

  


**Today** 6:16 PM

 **Patrick:** Any open windows? Backdoors?

  


**Today** 6:21 PM

 **David:** none that i could find

 **David:** i might need to hop a fence which i’m not excited about

  


**Today** 6:23 PM

 **Patrick:** Be careful

  


**Today** 6:35 PM

 **Patrick:** Did you get in somewhere?

  


**Today** 6:47 PM

 **Patrick:** David?

  


**Today** 6:52 PM

 **David:** fuck

 **David:** yeah i did

 **David:** i uh

 **David:** got the sleeve of my hoodie caught

 **David:** was gonna cut myself out but i tossed my backpack a bit too far from me

  


**Today** 7:04 PM

 **Patrick:** Are you okay? You didn’t get scraped or cut by anything?

  


**Today** 7:06 PM

 **David:** no i’m fine

 **David:** rip hoodie... i tore the entire sleeve

 **David:** thankfully i got another one

  


**Today** 7:14 PM

 **David:** ugh the back porch door is locked too

 **David:** but they have a treehouse in the backyard so i’ll stay in there for now i guess

  


**Today** 7:17 PM

 **Patrick:** Damn it

 **Patrick:** I was hoping to give you a day to rest but that doesn’t seem wise with you exposed

  


**Today** 7:20 PM

 **David:** i tried looking through the windows with the phone flashlight

 **David:** i think this place doesn’t have any security systems so maybe i could break a window or something?

  


**Today** 7:23 PM

 **Patrick:** Normally I’d advise that you do that

 **Patrick:** but I’m not entirely comfortable with the noise possibly drawing attention to you

  


**Today** 7:26 PM

 **David:** i haven’t passed a horde or even a single one of them on my way here

 **David:** they don’t have that good of hearing do they?

  


**Today** 7:29 PM

 **Patrick:** It’s not just the undead I’m worried about

  


**Today** 7:31 PM

 **David:** wow even in times as dire as these the living are still a concern?

  


**Today** 7:34 PM

 **Patrick:** Oh you’d be surprised

 **Patrick:** The majority of people show kindness and give you faith in humanity

 **Patrick:** But there are people out there who are just

 **Patrick:** Anyway

 **Patrick:** You should probably get some rest, if you can

  


**Today** 7:39 PM

 **David:** oh no we’re talking

 **David:** i didn’t walk for two hours straight without texting you to not attempt 20 questions, uninterrupted

  


**Today** 7:42 PM

 **Patrick:** Haha okay

  


**Patrick:** What do you want to know?

  


**Today** 7:45 PM

 **David:** you said you volunteered to do rescue and scouting missions?

 **David:** the names are pretty self explanatory

 **David:** did you come across bad people or

  


**Today** 7:49 PM

 **Patrick:** Earlier, when I left for a bit

 **Patrick:** I actually spotted a group coming towards SC, walked normally and kept shouting help, so not undead

 **Patrick:** Now you’d think: Good, more survivors! We can just open our gates and let them in right?

  


**Today** 7:52 PM

 **David:** yeah, of course

  


**Today** 7:53 PM

 **Patrick:** We thought that at first too

 **Patrick:** When the outbreak happened the first couple groups of people we got were healthy neighbors who escaped from the town over

 **Patrick:** Or people who drove aimlessly until they noticed that our town was boarded up, ergo most likely safe

 **Patrick:** The number of groups coming over was a bit overwhelming

 **Patrick:** Me and a few others willingly volunteered but most of the town preferred to work inside

 **Patrick:** It’s terrifying on the frontlines, so I don’t blame them

 **Patrick:** We didn’t have enough people to check every single person thoroughly to see if they got bit or not

  


**Today** 8:04 PM

 **David:** oh god this isn’t going where i think it is?

  


**Today** 8:05 PM

 **Patrick:** Unfortunately, yes

 **Patrick:** People would lie about getting bit

 **Patrick:** So many people would lie

 **Patrick:** They were scared, they didn’t want to die alone

 **Patrick:** I get that. And I felt bad for them, but

 **Patrick:** Three weeks ago, during the middle of the night a guy that snuck past us had turned

 **Patrick:** He killed everyone in his living quarters

 **Patrick:** Another rescuer, Twyla, had to snipe him and I had to go down to clean up the mess

 **Patrick:** We have limited space so I had to make it habitable ASAP

  


**Today** 8:12 PM

 **David:** jesus

  


**Today** 8:14 PM

 **Patrick:** So earlier today I had to go and screen the group with our unit lead Ronnie

 **Patrick:** She’s no bullshit and pretty ruthless

 **Patrick:** Thankfully for her I was able to come back unharmed to text you

  


**Today** 8:18 PM

 **David:** were they infected?

  


**Today** 8:21 PM

 **Patrick:** One of them was

 **Patrick:** They kept asking to be let in so their friend can get help, but Ronnie was insistent that if they wanted entry, they had to leave him

 **Patrick:** They wouldn’t budge

 **Patrick:** So she just shot the infected guy point blank and walked off

 **Patrick:** Told them to find another town

  


**Today** 8:26 PM

 **David:** holy shit????

 **David:** what is this an episode of the walking dead????

 **David:** she just left them?

  


**Today** 8:29 PM

 **Patrick:** Later she told me they were eyeing us weird

 **Patrick:** Clocking us to see if they could take us down and steal our weapons since we leave the premises fairly well armed

 **Patrick:** Most safe zones around us have a strict enter and you can’t leave unless authorized rule

 **Patrick:** So they had no intention of coming inside

 **Patrick:** They were probably trying to loot

  


**Today** 8:32 PM

 **David:** they used their friend as bait?

  


**Today** 8:34 PM

 **Patrick:** Thing is, I’m not even sure the guy was their friend

 **Patrick:** He had already gone into the dormant stage before turning so he wasn’t moving

  


**Today** 8:37 PM

 **David:** i'm

 **David:** wow

 **David:** and despite going through all this

 **David:** you’re still willing to help me? through text?

 **David:** with me being hundreds of miles away?

 **David:** how do you know if i’m not a bait person

  


**Today** 8:42 PM

 **Patrick:** You’re right. I don’t know

 **Patrick:** I guess that’s the risk I’m willing to take

 **Patrick:** And honestly, if a loot gang would be that creative by trying to use your methods to lure me

 **Patrick:** Well then that’s on me for falling for it

  


**Today** 8:46 PM

 **David:** excuse you i recall you saying i’m very entertaining

  


**Today** 8:48 PM

 **Patrick:** Did I though

 **Patrick:** My turn to ask a question then?

  


**Today** 8:50 PM

 **David:** mmm suppose that’s fair

 **David:** and no, i won’t tell you if i’m the bait in a looting gang

  


**Today** 8:52 PM

 **Patrick:** I’d be a fool to ask you such an obvious question, want you to keep your cover

  


**Today** 8:53 PM

 **David:** well ask away

  


**Today** 8:57 PM

 **Patrick:** Sorry uh

  


**Patrick:** Could we talk tomorrow?

 **Patrick:** I’ll send you the route for the next trip in the morning

  


**Today** 9:01 PM

 **David:** did something come up again?

  


**Today** 9:04 PM

 **Patrick:** Kind of? Nothing urgent though

 **Patrick:** The rescue crew wants to get drinks and we have a no phone policy because someone accidentally sent a nude to the food bank group chat while drunk

 **Patrick:** There are underage kids in that chat

  


**Today** 9:08 PM

 **David:** 😂😂😂

 **David:** that’s mortifying

 **David:** sounds like my kind of crowd tbh

  


**Today** 9:12 PM

 **Patrick:** I had to watch them apologize to the parents and it was the most embarrassing thing I’ve ever witnessed

  


**Today** 9:13 PM

 **David:** i’m sure it was probably the most excitement the town saw in a while

  


**Today** 9:14 PM

 **Patrick:** Oh it was

  


**Today** 9:18 PM

 **Patrick:** I um

  


**Patrick:** I would stay in and keep texting you but they’re threatening to look through my phone

  


**Today** 9:20 PM

 **David:** go

 **David:** i should sleep anyway

 **David:** or try to, in a treehouse with a child-sized mattress and tiny fleece blanket

  


**Today** 9:23 PM

 **David:** you got me curious about your question though

 **David:** gives me some motivation tomorrow to get to the next place so i can hear it

  


**Today** 9:25 PM

 **Patrick:** I’ll talk to you later?

  


**Today** 9:26 PM

 **David:** not until after 10

  


**Today** 9:28 PM

 **Patrick:** I know

  


**Patrick:** Goodnight, David

  


**Today** 9:30 PM

 **David:** goodnight

 **David:** have fun lol

  



	9. May 24 2020

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "speed walking and texting should be an olympic sport"

**11:22 PM** **20%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 10:42 AM

 **Patrick:** SHIT

  


**Patrick:** Oh god, sorry. I overslept

  


**Today** 10:45 AM

 **Patrick:** I forgot to map your route

 **Patrick:** Give me a minute

  


**Today** 10:50 AM

 **David:** hey

 **David:** it’s alright

 **David:** i’m feeling kinda lazy so take your time

  


**Today** 10:54 AM

 **David:** sounds like someone had fun last night

  


**Today** 11:00 AM

 **Patrick:** I suppose?

 **Patrick:** I mean, as much fun as you can have when you’re mixing beer and homemade moonshine

  


**Today** 11:05 AM

 **David:** sounds disgusting

  


**Today** 11:08 AM

 **Patrick:** Got a bit tipsy and kissed someone

  


**Today** 11:11 AM

 **David:** oh?

 **David:** lucky lady

  


**Today** 11:13 AM

 **Patrick:** It was a guy, actually

  


**Today** 11:15 AM

 **David:** ah

 **David:** lucky guy, then

  


**Today** 11:17 AM

 **Patrick:** Is it normal to not feel weird after?

  


**Today** 11:19 AM

 **David:** are you supposed to feel weird?

 **David:** you’re not that kind of straight guy are you

 **David:** a kiss is just a kiss it’s not a big deal unless you make it one

  


**Today** 11:24 AM

 **Patrick:** Well it’s just that I’ve never kissed a guy before

 **Patrick:** It answered a few questions for me

  


**Today** 11:26 AM

 **David:** oh

 **David:** you’re coming to a realization

 **David:** scared me for a minute there

  


**Today** 11:28 AM

 **Patrick:** Wait what

 **Patrick:** Did you think I was being homophobic

  


**Today** 11:31 AM

 **David:** no

 **David:** i’ve had my fair share of straight boys kiss me then proceed to freak the fuck out so

 **David:** i’m done with that nonsense

  


**Today** 11:34 AM

 **Patrick:** Wow I'm sorry

  


**Patrick:** Don’t blame you

  


**Today** 11:37 AM

 **David:** didn’t want to find out you’re like one of those people

 **David:** i actually think you’re nice

 **David:** and i never think people are nice

  


**Today** 11:39 AM

 **Patrick:** Glad I didn’t disappoint you then

  


**Today** 11:43 AM

 **David:** anyway

 **David:** the last time i limited my caloric intake was when i was trying some bullshit “don’t eat” diet fad

 **David:** but now i’m eating less to keep from finishing my food too fast

 **David:** this really sucks

  


**Today** 11:46 AM

 **Patrick:** You packed enough food?

  


**Today** 11:47 AM

 **David:** yeah. mostly dried foods so it’s not as heavy

 **David:** i snacked yesterday and didn’t eat dinner

  


**Today** 11:50 AM

 **Patrick:** I’ll try to route you to a place that has more houses to choose from

  


**Today** 11:52 AM

 **David:** it’s only my first day and i already spent a night exposed to the elements

 **David:** in a pretty decently built treehouse that has a retractable rope ladder but still

  


**Today** 11:54 AM

 **Patrick:** Gearing you up for when you have to camp later

  


**Today** 11:55 AM

 **David:** ugh

  


**Today** 12:11 PM

 **Patrick:** You up for continuing?

  


**Today** 12:13 PM

 **David:** of course

 **David:** like you said

 **David:** the sooner i start walking the sooner i’ll get there

 **David:** i’m going to sleep for days when i do

  


**Today** 12:17 PM

 **Patrick:** Wouldn’t expect any less from you

 **Patrick:** You’d deserve that rest anyway

  


**Today** 12:20 PM

 **Patrick:** Here’s the new route

  


**Today** 12:22 PM

 **David:** great, thanks

  


**Today** 12:46 PM

 **David:** alright i left the neighborhood

  


**Today** 12:49 PM

 **Patrick:** I’ll need to do some rounds later

 **Patrick:** But I’ll have my phone on me in case you need me

  


**Today** 12:52 PM

 **David:** got it

 **David:** be careful

  


**Today** 12:54 PM

 **Patrick:** I always am

 **Patrick:** Though you’re the one who should be careful

 **Patrick:** At least I’m armed and have people to help me

  


**Today** 12:57 PM

 **David:** mmm weird flex but ok

  


**Today** 3:01 PM

 **David:** um

 **David:** Patrick

 **David:** Patrick??

  


**Today** 3:03 PM

 **David:** you told me to notify you if i come across a horde right

 **David:** there’s one here

  


**Today** 3:06 PM

 **David:** holy fuck

 **David:** speed walking and texting should be an olympic sport

  


**Today** 3:08 PM

 **Patrick:** Shit

  


**Patrick:** They didn’t notice you right?

  


**Today** 3:10 PM

 **David:** if there’s anything i’m good at, it’s sneaking off

 **David:** yeah i spotted them at a distance

  


**Today** 3:13 PM

 **Patrick:** Good

  


**Patrick:** Find a place to hide

 **Patrick:** I’ll get back to you in a sec

  


**Today** 3:20 PM

 **Patrick:** Alright try to walk above my original route

 **Patrick:** It’s longer than the planned route but judging by how the hordes move you should be clear of them

  


**Today** 3:22 PM

 **David:** they have a moving pattern?

  


**Today** 3:24 PM

 **Patrick:** They tend to move in a linear fashion

 **Patrick:** A girl we rescued two weeks ago said she noticed that they tend to follow scents directly in front of them

 **Patrick:** Though uh

 **Patrick:** The way she found that out wasn’t pleasant

  


**Today** 3:26 PM

 **David:** oh god

 **David:** she watched people get eaten?

  


**Today** 3:28 PM

 **Patrick:** Do you really want to know?

  


**Today** 3:29 PM

 **David:** not really

 **David:** but i feel like i’ll be curious later so. tell me

  


**Today** 3:31 PM

 **Patrick:** I’ll spare you the details but we found her in her car that broke down

 **Patrick:** During her time in her car she saw things that confirmed her theory

  


**Today** 3:33 PM

 **David:** well that’s fucking traumatizing

  


**Today** 3:35 PM

 **Patrick:** Anyway I’ll stop distracting you with horrific stories

 **Patrick:** Keep going

  


**Today** 3:37 PM

 **David:** aw but i like you distracting me

  


**Today** 3:39 PM

 **Patrick:** I’m gonna stop responding to you

  


**Today** 3:42 PM

 **David:** buzzkill

  


**Today** 5:54 PM

 **David:** okay i walked for two hours

 **David:** in a moderately safe place rn, gonna take a break and have a snack

 **David:** you can distract me now

  


**Today** 6:03 PM

 **David:** are you still busy with your rounds?

  


**Today** 6:08 PM

 **Patrick:** No. I was just finishing up with some clean up outside the premises

  


**Today** 6:10 PM

 **David:** you have to clean up outside too?

 **David:** why

  


**Today** 6:13 PM

 **Patrick:** By clean up

  


**Patrick:** I meant the undead

  


**Today** 6:15 PM

 **David:** oh

 **David:** there’s zombies around the town?

 **David:** i thought it was safe?

  


**Today** 6:18 PM

 **Patrick:** There’s always cases of people who reach the outskirts of the town that have already gotten bit

 **Patrick:** They’d turn and then start loitering around

 **Patrick:** It’s better to take out the single ones to prevent them forming a horde

 **Patrick:** The town is safer that way

  


**Today** 6:21 PM

 **David:** the-more-you-know.gif

  


**Today** 6:22 PM

 **Patrick:** What

  


**Today** 6:23 PM

 **David:** you don’t know that meme?

 **David:** i didn’t want to waste time looking for the gif so i typed it lol

  


**Today** 6:25 PM

 **Patrick:** Yeah don’t know that meme

  


**Today** 6:26 PM

 **David:** i have so much i need to teach you when we meet

  


**Today** 6:27 PM

 **Patrick:** Oh you’re looking forward to meeting me?

  


**Today** 6:30 PM

 **David:** well yeah

 **David:** unless you don’t wanna meet? don’t tell me you look worse than your profile pic

  


**Today** 6:33 PM

 **Patrick:** You’re just gonna have to find that out for yourself

  


**Today** 6:35 PM

 **Patrick:** Curious to know what you look like, honestly

  


**Today** 6:37 PM

 **David:** hope you’re prepared to see how breathtakingly gorgeous i am

  


**Today** 6:39 PM

 **Patrick:** I’m sure those eye masks you packed definitely upped your gorgeousness factor

  


**Today** 6:41 PM

 **David:** you sure paid close attention to my past texts didn’t you

  


**Today** 6:42 PM

 **Patrick:** Hard not to

  


**Today** 6:47 PM

 **Patrick:** As much as I want to keep talking, you should get moving

 **Patrick:** We had a late start today

  


**Today** 6:49 PM

 **David:** aww come on

 **David:** just a couple more minutes?

 **David:** no?

  


**Today** 6:57 PM

 **David:** ughhh fine

  


**Today** 7:29 PM

 **David:** my feet’s getting super sore

 **David:** i really hope the next place actually has a house for me

  


**Today** 7:31 PM

 **Patrick:** How far along are you?

  


**Today** 7:32 PM

 **David:** i think i have around another hour and a half left

 **David:** i’m walking as fast as i can

  


**Today** 7:34 PM

 **Patrick:** I'm proud of you

 **Patrick:** Remember you haven’t heard my question for you yet

  


**Today** 7:36 PM

 **David:** walking faster

  


**Today** 7:39 PM

 **Patrick:** That’s the spirit

  


**Today** 8:43 PM

 **David:** okay the checkpoint you gave me?

 **David:** the houses there were open alright

 **David:** ransacked

 **David:** i’m going back to the neighborhood i just passed by

  


**Today** 8:46 PM

 **Patrick:** David

  


**Patrick:** Go to the ransacked houses

 **Patrick:** Find one that has the least damage

 **Patrick:** I know it’s scary

 **Patrick:** But because they’ve already been touched no one will bother with them

 **Patrick:** I really rather you not risk it

  


**Today** 8:50 PM

 **David:** you’re kidding right

 **David:** no

 **David:** i’m not fucking going in there

  


**Today** 8:52 PM

 **Patrick:** David. Please.

 **Patrick:** I need you to trust me right now

  


**Today** 8:54 PM

 **David:** i can’t believe i’m gonna get murdered instead of eaten by zombies

 **David:** what the fuck

  


**Today** 8:59 PM

 **David:** sorry. i can’t take your advice

 **David:** i can’t

  


**Today** 9:24 PM

 **David:** got into a place five blocks down that looked safe

 **David:** no one’s around

 **David:** drew the curtains

 **David:** locked every possible thing

  


**Today** 9:40 PM

 **David:** found some canned fruit

 **David:** gonna have one for dinner. taking the rest with me

  


**Today** 10:13 PM

 **David:** you’re probably mad at me now so i’m just gonna go take a shower and pass out for a bit

**Read** , 10:19 PM

  



	10. May 25 2020

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "karma’s a bitch"

**9:19 AM** **91%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 6:10 AM

 **David:** the bed was so lumpy but i guess six hours of sleep is better than none

  


**Today** 6:14 AM

 **David:** if you’re awake

**David:** i’m open for questions

  


**Today** 6:20 AM

 **David:** are you really going to leave me on read just because i didn’t take your advice

  


**Today** 6:25 AM

 **Patrick:** How am I supposed to help keep you safe if you don’t listen to me?

  


**Today** 6:28 AM

 **David:** hey you know what, asshole? you’re not here!

**David:** of course you can give me advice freely and think they’re easy to follow when you know how to deal with zombies AND ill intentioned people

  


**Today** 6:31 AM

 **David:** i never asked for your help

**David:** i was fine staying in Rochester

**David:** my shitty friends all got ambushed by a horde when they tried to abandon me in the middle of the night

**David:** so fuck if i don’t at least trust my instincts enough to know how to avoid that

  


**Today** 6:35 AM

 **Patrick:** Your friends abandoned you?

  


**Today** 6:36 AM

 **David:** oh so now you want to play 20 questions

**David:** sorry i don’t feel like it anymore

  


**Today** 6:38 AM

 **Patrick:** It’s not that I don’t believe you can take care of yourself

**Patrick:** But you have to understand it’s scary for me here too, not being able to have visuals of your surroundings and relying on the limited information I have

  


**Today** 6:40 AM

 **Patrick:** You don’t have to take my advice if you feel it’s not right in the moment

**Patrick:** I promise I won’t overreact next time

**Patrick:** I just want you to arrive as unscathed as possible, David

  


**Today** 6:43 AM

 **David:** you want me to trust you? why don’t you start by trusting that i’m trying my best here

**David:** it’s only been two days and i’m exhausted

  


**Today** 6:45 AM

 **Patrick:** I know how hard this is for you and I know you’re doing all you can

**Patrick:** I didn’t take your feelings into account

**Patrick:** For that, I’m sorry

  


**Today** 6:49 AM

 **Patrick:** But now that you’ve gotten some rest

**Patrick:** Go to the original checkpoint

**Patrick:** You can finish resting up there

  


**Today** 6:51 AM

 **David:** original checkpoint

**David:** you mean the ransacked neighborhood?

  


**Today** 6:52 AM

 **Patrick:** Yes

  


**Today** 6:53 AM

 **David:** what did i just tell you?

**David:** NO

**David:** it didn’t just look ransacked, Patrick

**David:** it felt like something was there

  


**Today** 6:58 AM

 **Patrick:** Okay 

  


**Patrick:** I trust your gut instinct

**Patrick:** Then I need you to keep going

**Patrick:** Leave that entire area, now

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Patrick:** Please David

  


**Today** 7:04 AM

 **Patrick:** David.

  


**Today** 7:06 AM

 **David:** fine

  


**Today** 7:08 AM

 **David:** fuck

  


**Today** 7:14 AM

 **David:** fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck

  


**Today** 7:15 AM

 **Patrick:** What is it?

  


**Patrick:** David?

  


**Today** 7:20 AM

 **Patrick:** Talk to me what’s going on??

  


**Today** 7:28 AM

 **David:** i heard the front door get hacked open

**David:** someone

**David:** someone broke in

**David:** i’m hiding in the attic

**David:** please please please don’t come up here fuckkkkk

**David:** aw fuck why do i have to start crying rn fuck

  


**Today** 7:32 AM

 **Patrick:** Shh it’s okay you’re gonna be okay

**Patrick:** Usually ransackers are looking for food or useful tools and weaponry so they’d go for the kitchen and the basement

**Patrick:** I’m sure there isn’t anything of value to them in an attic

**Patrick:** You’re gonna be okay

  


**Today** 7:36 AM

 **David:** i guess this is where you tell me you told me so huh

**David:** karma’s a bitch

  


**Today** 7:38 AM

 **Patrick:** Why would I do that?

  


**Today** 7:39 AM

 **David:** i didn’t listen and ta da! the very place you told me not to stay at gets broken into

  


**Today** 7:40 AM

 **Patrick:** Stop it

  


**Patrick:** It’s not your fault

  


**Today** 7:44 AM

 **David:** shit shit shit shit i can hear them stomping around below

**David:** oh god

  


**Today** 7:46 AM

 **Patrick:** It’s going to be okay

**Patrick:** They’re not going to find you

  


**Today** 7:48 AM

 **David:** god i’m shaking so hard i can’t type

  


**Today** 7:50 AM

 **Patrick:** It’s okay, you’re gonna be okay

  


**Today** 7:57 AM

 **David:** it’s quiet now

**David:** i think they went back downstairs

  


**Today** 8:00 AM

 **Patrick:** That’s a relief

**Patrick:** Stay up there for a little longer, don’t risk it

  


**Today** 8:02 AM

 **David:** i know

  


**Today** 8:05 AM

 **Patrick:** Could you answer the question I asked earlier?

  


**Today** 8:07 AM

 **David:** what?

**David:** what question??

**David:** now??

**David:** how will that make things better

  


**Today** 8:10 AM

 **Patrick:** I'm trying to keep you distracted okay?

  


**Today** 8:13 AM

 **Patrick:** How did you get abandoned by your friends?

  


**Today** 8:15 AM

 **David:** how?

**David:** what do you mean how

  


**Today** 8:17 AM

 **Patrick:** David focus

  


**Patrick:** They’re already gone

**Patrick:** Focus on the question don’t think about anything else

  


**Today** 8:20 AM

 **David:** okay...

**David:** we were out partying the night before

**David:** before the outbreak happened

**David:** only made it to Rochester

**David:** since the highways were jam packed

**David:** they stuck with me because i paid for everything

**David:** which is typical

**David:** my sister managed to text me amongst the chaos

**David:** and i found out my family was broke

  


**Today** 8:24 AM

 **David:** i woke up later

**David:** found myself alone

**David:** i guess i became useless to them overnight

  


**Today** 8:26 AM

 **David:** found them a couple days later in a horde when i left

  


**Today** 8:27 AM

 **Patrick:** They deserved what they got

**Patrick:** God I’m sorry this happened to you

  


**Today** 8:29 AM

 **David:** it comes with the territory

**David:** i’m used to it

  


**Today** 8:30 AM

 **Patrick:** You shouldn’t be, no one should get used to being used

  


**Today** 8:33 AM

 **David:** should i leave

  


**Today** 8:34 AM

 **Patrick:** Actually, don’t

**Patrick:** It’s safer if you just stay there

**Patrick:** It’s probably hard for you to sleep now but you should try and get more rest

  


**Today** 8:37 AM

 **David:** unlikely i’ll sleep again after that

**David:** but now that you mentioned it i’m drained

  


**Today** 8:39 AM

 **David:** would you stay with me until i fall asleep?

  


**Today** 8:40 AM

 **Patrick:** Of course

  


**Today** 8:43 AM

 **David:** were you up all night?

**David:** you didn’t stay up for me did you?

  


**Today** 8:45 AM

 **Patrick:** Would it add bonus points for me in your book if I did?

  


**Today** 8:46 AM

 **David:** debatable

**David:** but probably

  


**Today** 8:47 AM

 **Patrick:** Wish I could lie and say I did then

**Patrick:** But I’m actually on my watch shift

  


**Today** 8:49 AM

 **David:** wait you’re walking around on patrol and you kept texting me?

  


**Today** 8:50 AM

 **Patrick:** That would’ve been unwise

**Patrick:** We have these makeshift watch towers so I’m actually in one

**Patrick:** I’m staying still

  


**Today** 8:52 AM

 **David:** oh good

**David:** wouldn’t be able to live with myself if you were putting yourself in harms way for me

  


**Today** 8:54 AM

 **Patrick:** Aww are you worried about me?

  


**Today** 8:55 AM

 **David:** no

  


**Today** 8:58 AM

 **David:** shut up

  


**Today** 9:00 AM

 **Patrick:** I’ll be more careful for your sake

  


**Today** 9:03 AM

 **Patrick:** Be careful for me too

  


**Today** 9:11 AM

 **Patrick:** Did you fall asleep?

  


**Patrick:** I’m assuming you did

  


**Today** 9:13 AM

 **Patrick:** Sleep tight

  



	11. May 25 2020 (cont.)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "but for pizza i might just speed walk"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note that the updating times have changed to every Monday and Thursday (instead of Friday)!

**4:03 PM** **82%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 11:08 AM

 **David:** i think i’m having a heart attack

  


**Today** 11:19 AM

 **David:** wait no

 **David:** i googled and i think i have a pulmonary embolism or something?

  


**Today** 11:24 AM

 **David:** fuck

 **David:** my chest feels tight and i can’t breathe

  


**Today** 11:28 AM

 **David:** i need to leave the attic i have to leave

 **David:** i’m leaving

  


**Today** 11:36 AM

 **Patrick:** What??

 **Patrick:** Wait David wait don’t leave the house

 **David:** i’m not i’m just leaving the attic

 **David:** i’d prefer to not rot in an attic

  


**Today** 11:41 AM

 **Patrick:** David I don’t think you’re having a heart attack

  


**Today** 11:46 AM

 **David:** how do you know

 **David:** i feel like i’m dying

 **David:** my heart is going really fast

 **Patrick:** You’re probably having a panic attack

 **Patrick:** With what happened this morning it makes sense

  


**Today** 11:53 AM

 **David:** what

 **David:** panic attacks aren’t real

  
  


**Patrick:** Yes they are

 **Patrick:** You were under severe stress and it could trigger it

  


**Today** 11:58 AM

 **David:** okay no i don’t get panic attacks okay i don’t have a PR stunt to pull

 **David:** what the fuck

  


**Today** 12:04 PM

 **Patrick:** David I need you to breathe

  


**Today** 12:08 PM

 **Patrick:** Take a deep breath

  


**Today** 12:12 PM

 **David:** what part of i can’t breathe did you not understand

 **Patrick:** Just TRY to breathe David

 **Patrick:** Work with me here, please

  


**Today** 12:17 PM

 **David:** took a deep breath

 **David:** didn’t help

 **Patrick:** Okay I know you didn’t actually take one

  


**Today** 12:21 PM

 **Patrick:** Alright here

  


**Patrick:** Breathe along with my texts

 **Patrick:** Do as I say. I’m trying to help you here

  


**Today** 12:25 PM

 **Patrick:** Breathe in

  


**Patrick:** Are you breathing in?

 **David:** yes!

  


**Today** 12:28 PM

 **Patrick:** Good

  


**Patrick:** Now breathe out

  


**Today** 12:30 PM

 **Patrick:** Breathe in again

  


**Today** 12:32 PM

 **Patrick:** Just focus on my words and your breathing don’t think about anything else

 **Patrick:** Okay breathe out

  


**Today** 12:35 PM

 **Patrick:** Breathe in

  


**Patrick:** And out

  


**Today** 12:39 PM

 **Patrick:** Is your heartbeat calming down?

 **David:** a little?

  


**Today** 12:44 PM

 **Patrick:** Breathe, David

 **Patrick:** I’d advise something like a sour candy or something spicy to help but I don’t think you have that on hand

  


**Today** 12:48 PM

 **David:** I have a pack of breath mints

 **David:** Would that work

  


**Today** 12:50 PM

 **Patrick:** I don’t know

  


**Patrick:** You could try?

  


**Today** 12:52 PM

 **Patrick:** Keep breathing deeply though

  


**Today** 12:56 PM

 **David:** i’m breathing

 **David:** i think the mints helped slightly

  


**Today** 1:03 PM

 **Patrick:** Feeling better?

 **David:** better than i was earlier

 **David:** thanks, Patrick

  


**Today** 1:06 PM

 **Patrick:** Don’t mention it

  


**Today** 1:12 PM

 **Patrick:** I had my very first panic attack not too long ago so I know what you’re going through

 **Patrick:** It can be overwhelming

  


**Today** 1:16 PM

 **David:** really?

 **David:** you also never got it before?

 **Patrick:** Yeah never had one prior to this incident

  


**Today** 1:20 PM

 **David:** mind if i ask what it was?

 **David:** you don’t have to tell me if you’re not comfortable, of course

 **Patrick:** It’s been a while

 **Patrick:** Wasn’t sure if I was ready to talk about it but I think I can now

  


**Today** 1:24 PM

 **Patrick:** Are you counting that as an official question, then?

 **David:** oh we’re back to playing the game?

 **David:** yeah sure, that’s my question

  


**Today** 1:28 PM

 **Patrick:** I got it around three months ago before I was going to get married to Rachel

 **Patrick:** The owner of your phone

 **David:** oh

 **David:** is that why you left her so abruptly?

  


**Today** 1:31 PM

 **Patrick:** Sort of

 **Patrick:** I couldn’t explain to her what was going on inside my head

 **Patrick:** Honestly, even I couldn’t understand it myself

 **Patrick:** I just felt so overwhelmed

 **Patrick:** I needed to leave. Run away

  


**Today** 1:34 PM

 **David:** wow this sound serious

 **David:** i’m not the best person for advice but i can listen

  


**Today** 1:38 PM

 **Patrick:** Should I be honored?

 **David:** oh totally

 **David:** i don’t usually lend an ear to people i just met but i suppose you’re an exception

  


**Today** 1:42 PM

 **Patrick:** Thanks for offering, anyway

 **David:** mmm don’t thank me just yet

 **David:** anyway keep going

  


**Today** 1:45 PM

 **Patrick:** We’d broken up so many times before and then got back together

 **Patrick:** Every time I think it’ll be different because she tries to change herself for me

 **Patrick:** But It’s not fair when I couldn’t change myself

 **Patrick:** And god I really tried. I wanted us to work

 **Patrick:** I don’t know how to tell her this without her thinking she’s the one causing my breakdown

  


**Today** 1:49 PM

 **David:** i’ve had my fair share of people leave me by skipping town but they’re everywhere so it’s just a convenient excuse

 **David:** for you though, it sounds extreme

  


**Today** 1:52 PM

 **Patrick:** Rachel loves me, more than anything

 **Patrick:** And I love her too, but it never felt right

 **Patrick:** I thought maybe I was aromantic or something along that spectrum

 **Patrick:** Because all those things people talk about being in love? I’ve never felt them

  


**Today** 1:57 PM

 **David:** so maybe you are aromantic

 **David:** did you think that Rachel wouldn’t be able to handle that?

 **David:** If she loves you as much as you claim, then i don’t see how she’d have a problem with it

  


**Today** 2:00 PM

 **Patrick:** Right

  


**Patrick:** I thought about that

 **Patrick:** But then I realized that wasn’t it

  


**Today** 2:03 PM

 **David:** oh?

  


**Today** 2:05 PM

 **Patrick:** Remember that night when I went out for drinks with my crew and I ended up kissing this guy?

 **David:** yeah

  


**Today** 2:08 PM

 **Patrick:** Never kissed a guy before in my life and the difference was staggering

  


**Today** 2:12 PM

 **David:** so you were into guys the whole time

  


**Today** 2:15 PM

 **David:** maybe you can get yourself a boyfriend now

 **David:** like that guy you kissed

  


**Today** 2:17 PM

 **Patrick:** Jake doesn’t do exclusivity

 **Patrick:** And I don’t feel that way towards him. No one in this town anyway

 **Patrick:** I did thank him for answering a few questions for me

 **Patrick:** He was very confused but just went with it haha

  


**Today** 2:20 PM

 **David:** good for you for figuring it out finally

 **David:** i’m sure that must’ve felt like a weight’s been lifted

 **Patrick:** Oh definitely

  


**Today** 2:23 PM

 **David:** have you spoken to Rachel since then?

 **David:** told her about this revelation?

  


**Today** 2:26 PM

 **Patrick:** She’s sharing a phone with her friend so I can’t text her

 **Patrick:** I’ve been meaning to call, trying to muster up the courage to tell her

 **Patrick:** I did call her last week before I went on my scouting trip, couldn’t do it

  


**Today** 2:29 PM

 **David:** that’s okay

 **David:** tell her when you’re fully ready

 **David:** it’s a personal thing, coming out to a loved one, but you owe them nothing unless you’re prepared

  


**Today** 2:32 PM

 **Patrick:** I’ll tell her soon

 **Patrick:** She deserves to know, and to have closure

  


**Today** 2:35 PM

 **David:** in your own time, don’t rush it

  


**Today** 2:37 PM

 **Patrick:** Yeah.

  


**Patrick:** Thank you, David

  


**Today** 2:39 PM

 **Patrick:** I’m going to need to fight your claim that you don’t give good advice

 **David:** you just happened to talk about something i understand

 **David:** ask me about anything else and you’ll get very little response

  


**Today** 2:42 PM

 **Patrick:** Oh so I can’t ask you which mall pretzel is the best one?

  


**Today** 2:45 PM

 **David:** Okay we’re not getting into that right now because you will NOT hear the end of it

  


**Today** 2:48 PM

 **Patrick:** Maybe you can tell me all about it when you get here

 **David:** i’d like that

 **David:** though you’re really going to make me miss mall pretzels

  


**Today** 2:51 PM

 **Patrick:** well if it’s any consolation we have Pizza Fridays at the end of each month

 **David:** no way

 **David:** fresh handmade pizza?

  


**Today** 2:53 PM

 **Patrick:** Yep

  


**Patrick:** It’s a treat for the town to keep the morale up

 **Patrick:** One of the artisanal pizza owners escaped from Elm Glen and lives here so we’re pretty lucky

  


**Today** 2:55 PM

 **David:** well shit send me the next map right now

 **David:** i won’t run for anything

 **David:** but for pizza i might just speed walk

  


**Today** 2:58 PM

 **Patrick:** Haha okay I didn’t draft one up yet give me a minute

  


**Today** 3:01 PM

 **Patrick:** I’d opt for you to stay there until tomorrow but I think you’d want out of there

 **David:** honestly i’m about to bolt out of here without instructions

  


**Today** 3:05 PM

 **Patrick:** Then it’s going to be a shorter trip since you’re starting late today

  


**Today** 3:08 PM

 **David:** that’s fine

 **David:** every bit counts, right

  


**Today** 3:13 PM

 **David:** just don’t y’know 

**David:** send me to another ransacked neighborhood

  


**Today** 3:15 PM

 **Patrick:** I’ll try my best to send you right into a big horde

  


**Today** 3:18 PM

 **David:** please

 **David:** i seek death’s merciful embrace

  


**Today** 3:20 PM

 **Patrick:** Have you eaten by chance?

 **David:** bold of you to assume i haven’t

 **David:** i’m eating a granola bar as i’m typing

 **David:** had some fruit prior to this

  


**Today** 3:24 PM

 **Patrick:** Great

 **Patrick:** I’m helping with the food bank later today, though my phone will be on me

 **Patrick:** I’ll check it when I can, but you know how it is

  


**Today** 3:26 PM

 **David:** wow you don’t get a day of rest huh

 **Patrick:** We all have to pitch in somewhat

 **Patrick:** And I tend to get a bit in my head if I’m not busy with something

  


**Today** 3:29 PM

 **David:** sounds exhausting

  


**Today** 3:40 PM

 **David:** IMG_202005251.jpg

 **David:** wow they really trashed the place

 **Patrick:** Are you sending that to frighten me or yourself

 **Patrick:** Get out of there

  


**Today** 3:44 PM

 **David:** going

  



	12. May 25 2020 (cont. pt 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I’ll just throw you over my shoulder like a sack of potatoes"

**11:11 PM** **38%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 5:46 PM

 **David:** IMG_202005259.jpg

 **David:** making progress

  


**Today** 5:58 PM

 **David:** it’s so empty out here

  


**Today** 6:12 PM

 **David:** my feet still hurt from yesterday

  


**Today** 6:18 PM

 **Patrick:** Are you going to make it though?

 **Patrick:** Not going to randomly collapse are you

 **David:** unclear if i’ll make it

 **David:** might just dramatically crumble in the middle of the road like a damsel in distress

 **Patrick:** Sorry damsel I can’t pick you up I’m busy with the canned foods

 **David:** didn’t ask you to

  


**Today** 6:25 PM

 **David:** though i highly doubt you could pick me up

  


**Today** 6:28 PM

 **Patrick:** Is that a challenge, David?

 **David:** i dunno

 **David:** you want it to be?

  


**Today** 6:30 PM

 **Patrick:** I’ll just throw you over my shoulder like a sack of potatoes

 **David:** you’re not going to get yourself a boyfriend with that move

  


**Today** 6:33 PM

 **Patrick:** Who’s to say

 **Patrick:** Some guy out there might like it

  


**Today** 6:36 PM

 **David:** ok calm down country boy

  


**Patrick:** 🤠🥔💪

 **David:** mmm i kinda hate you right now!!

  


**Today** 6:39 PM

 **Patrick:** Then keep your eyes on the road and stop texting me

 **David:** why don’t you stop responding

  


**Today** 8:03 PM

 **David:** had to check several houses before i found one that was unlocked

 **David:** i really wish i had Alexis’ lock picking kit

 **David:** really wanted to get into that nice house a few blocks up

 **Patrick:** What now?

  


**Today** 8:06 PM

 **David:** my sister is a master at a bunch of illegal stuff

 **David:** i think she dated a luxury car thief or something? taught her how to pick all sorts of locks

 **David:** gifted her this lock picking kit that she showed off to me

 **David:** would come in real handy right now

 **Patrick:** I have to agree with you there

  


**Today** 8:09 PM

 **Patrick:** Are you safe?

  


**Today** 8:12 PM

 **David:** IMG_2020052523.jpg

 **David:** The interior is so ugly but what choice do i have

 **Patrick:** What a difficult time for you

 **David:** it’s a struggle for sure

  


**Today** 8:18 PM

 **David:** eating dinner on the couch now

 **David:** how was the food bank?

  


**Today** 8:21 PM

 **Patrick:** It was fine

 **Patrick:** We do weekly shifts of rationing and inventory

 **Patrick:** I wish we didn’t have to do inventory

 **Patrick:** but unfortunately, people steal

 **David:** why am i not surprised that people steal food from the food bank

 **Patrick:** We’ve only had it happen once

 **Patrick:** Though once is enough for a town wide upset

 **Patrick:** So now we’re just extra vigilant about it

  


**Today** 8:26 PM

 **David:** wait but what if you’re super hungry?

  


**Today** 8:28 PM

 **Patrick:** We actually do account for people who have a bigger appetite since there are several members here that eat less

 **Patrick:** But for the most part, we have to keep it strict but fair

 **David:** yeah that’s reasonable

  


**Today** 8:32 PM

 **Patrick:** When you get here though I’ll make sure you get enough to eat

 **Patrick:** A special privilege to being my friend

  


**Today** 8:34 PM

 **David:** are you accusing me of eating too much?

 **Patrick:** Oh I would never

 **Patrick:** Don’t want you to get hangry is all

 **David:** okay where in my texts have i showcased i get hangry

  


**Today** 8:37 PM

 **Patrick:** So you’re saying you don’t?

 **Patrick:** I recall you complaining about having to ration your food

 **David:** i wasn’t complaining!

 **David:** just stating facts

 **Patrick:** Haha alright alright you weren’t complaining

 **Patrick:** It does suck that you can’t eat as much as you want. I get it, it’s not fun

  


**Today** 8:40 PM

 **David:** i will take you up on the friendship privilege thing though

 **Patrick:** I’m counting on it

 **Patrick:** Let someone do something for you for once

 **David:** that’s really kind of you

 **Patrick:** It’s the least I can do

  


**Today** 8:44 PM

 **David:** could i ask you something?

  


**Patrick:** Of course

  


**Today** 8:46 PM

 **David:** what was the question you were gonna ask me that night in the treehouse?

 **David:** i’m still curious

 **David:** even though i know the moment is probably over

  


**Today** 8:49 PM

 **Patrick:** It was nothing

 **Patrick:** I was going to ask about your phone

 **David:** what about my phone

  


**Today** 8:51 PM

 **Patrick:** Wanted to text to your phone

  


**Today** 8:53 PM

 **David:** Patrick

 **David:** are you trying to ask for my number

  


**Today** 8:56 PM

 **Patrick:**...maybe?

 **Patrick:** It’s weird texting my ex-fiancee's number to someone that isn’t her

 **David:** mmhmm i get that

 **David:** but are you asking me for my number tho?

  


**Today** 8:58 PM

 **Patrick:** Okay fine I am

 **Patrick:** David can I have your number?

  


**Today** 9:00 PM

 **David:** i’d give it to you since you asked so nicely

 **David:** but i lost it when i was running from a horde weeks ago

 **David:** it fell out of my hoodie pocket and i couldn’t take the risk to go back and get it

 **Patrick:** Oh no I’m sorry

  


**Today** 9:02 PM

 **David:** yeah so now i’ve learned to keep it zipped up in my jacket or my pants

  


**Today** 9:04 PM

 **David:** i hope you changed the name from Rachel to David

 **David:** or it would be super awkward

 **Patrick:** Of course I did

  


**Today** 9:07 PM

 **Patrick:** I am missing a profile picture of you though

 **David:** subtlety is not your strong suit huh

 **Patrick:** Afraid not

  


**Today** 9:11 PM

 **David:** I’m not gonna take a selfie for you

 **David:** i’m a mess

 **David:** i could only pack so much of my skin care products so i’m down from 9 steps to 5

 **David:** the bags under my eyes have bags

  


**Today** 9:14 PM

 **Patrick:** I don’t care about that honestly

 **Patrick:** And I’m bound to see you when I come get you anyway

 **Patrick:** So what’s the difference

 **David:** maybe i want to keep you in suspense

  


**Today** 9:17 PM

 **Patrick:** That wouldn’t be fair

 **Patrick:** You have Rachel’s phone

 **Patrick:** How do I know you haven’t already seen pictures of me

 **David:** trust me i haven’t

 **David:** i’ll admit curiosity did get the best of me the other day but it’s all in her cloud

 **David:** which i can’t log into

  


**Today** 9:20 PM

 **David:** also the next time you talk to Rachel

 **David:** tell her 0987 is a bad PIN number

  


**Today** 9:22 PM

 **Patrick:** You mean a bad PIN?

 **David:** whatever you know what i mean

  


**Today** 9:24 PM

 **Patrick:** I have told her not to use a PIN that is easy to guess but she insists that she doesn’t want to complicate her life

  


**Today** 9:26 PM

 **David:** well i changed it

  


**Today** 10:04 PM

 **Patrick:** Oops I fell asleep

 **Patrick:** I’ve been up for 36 hours and you’re probably exhausted too

 **Patrick:** We both need to get some rest

  


**Today** 10:06 PM

 **David:** oh god you’ve been up for that long?

 **David:** you really should sleep

  


**Today** 10:09 PM

 **Patrick:** Are you okay with staying in that place for an extra day?

 **Patrick:** It’s safe enough right?

  


**Today** 10:12 PM

 **David:** yeah, it seems like it

 **David:** you sent me to a pretty small town so i think it’ll be okay

  


**Today** 10:15 PM

 **Patrick:** Well for your sake I hope you can actually take a break

 **Patrick:** The next couple of days I might need to ask you to walk for longer periods of time

  


**Today** 10:17 PM

 **David:** ugh i’m not looking forward to that

 **Patrick:** Me neither but I want to get you as close to SC ASAP

 **Patrick:** You probably need to try and find camping gear along the way too

  


**Today** 10:21 PM

 **David:** could we talk about that when the time comes

 **David:** i really don’t want to think about that right now

  
  
  
  


**Patrick:** Yeah

  


**Today** 10:25 PM

 **Patrick:** We’ll talk tomorrow?

 **David:** we can talk whenever you like

  


**Today** 10:27 PM

 **Patrick:** Not before 10 of course

 **David:** you know me

  


**Today** 10:30 PM

 **Patrick:** Goodnight, David

 **David:** goodnight, Patrick

  



	13. May 26 2020

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "i’m going to block you"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is by far my favorite chapter I've ever written. I hope this is one of many chapters I'll be excited to share with all of you <3
> 
> (Please note the updated tags!)

**10:54 PM** **61%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 3:11 PM

 **David:** so i slept for 15 hours

 **David:** record breaking

 **David:** first time i slept that long without being under the influence or having popped some pills

  


**Today** 3:20 PM

 **David:** this family has cereal but the milk went bad

 **David:** god i’d kill for some milk

  


**Today** 3:22 PM

 **Patrick:** We have milk here

  


**Patrick:** Fresh milk

 **Patrick:** But you have to milk the cow yourself

 **David:** i have to what

 **Patrick:** Yeah if you want any sort of fresh food you have to get it from the farm

  


**Today** 3:25 PM

 **Patrick:** See

  


**Patrick:** IMG_2020042182.jpg

  


**Today** 3:27 PM

 **David:** are you petting a cow

 **Patrick:** Her name is Daisy she’s really sweet

 **David:** i’m not going near that thing

  


**Today** 3:29 PM

 **Patrick:** Well then you can’t have milk with your cereal

  


**Today** 3:31 PM

 **Patrick:** You also have to go into the hen house to get eggs if you want fresh eggs too

 **Patrick:** They’re not as friendly

 **David:** what sort of demonic town are you living in

  


**Today** 3:33 PM

 **Patrick:** Welcome to Schitt’s Creek

 **Patrick:** Don’t tell me you don’t know how to hogtie a pig

 **Patrick:** Seems like there’s a lot I will have to teach you when you get here

  


**Today** 3:35 PM

 **David:** i might not know how to hogtie a pig

 **David:** but i have tied up a full-grown man and had him suspended two feet in the air

 **Patrick:** What?

 **David:** i won't elaborate beyond that

 **David:** just know a Raf Simons custom made tie was involved

 **David:** and a Hermes Flash Sailor backpack

 **David:** which i won btw

  


**Today** 3:38 PM

 **Patrick:** I have no idea what any of those words mean

 **David:** told you

 **David:** you have a lot to learn

  


**Today** 3:41 PM

 **Patrick:** IMG_2020052612.jpg

  


**Patrick:** Enjoy

 **David:** i don’t care about your stupid cup of milk

  


**Today** 3:43 PM

 **David:** ….are those pancakes

 **David:** so CRUEL

  


**Today** 3:45 PM

 **Patrick:** Yep

  


**Patrick:** We rationed a big batch of pancake mix yesterday, the expiration date was coming up

  


**Today** 3:47 PM

 **David:** well i’ll be over here enjoying my lucky charms

  


**Today** 3:49 PM

 **Patrick:** Though, if you were here

 **Patrick:** You could be enjoying Cinnamon Toast Crunch-- with milk

 **David:** UNFAIR

  


**Today** 3:51 PM

 **Patrick:** IMG_2020052624.jpg

 **Patrick:** Told you the hens weren’t friendly

 **David:** holy shit is that your hand?

  


**Today** 3:53 PM

 **Patrick:** It’s all worth it for fresh butter-scrambled eggs

  


**Today** 3:55 PM

 **David:** i can’t believe i have to look forward to getting maimed by animals to get food

  


**Today** 3:57 PM

 **Patrick:** You’re adorable

 **David:** ew don’t call me adorable

  


**Today** 4:00 PM

 **Patrick:** I was absolutely messing with you there

  


**Today** 4:02 PM

 **Patrick:** Normal townsfolk aren’t allowed to handle all that

 **Patrick:** We actually have designated people in charge of the livestock

  


**Today** 4:04 PM

 **Patrick:** One upped ya city boy!

  


**Today** 4:06 PM

 **David:** i’m going to block you

 **Patrick:** You don’t have the heart

 **David:** try me

  


**Today** 4:09 PM

 **Patrick:** So. My turn to ask you a question?

  


**Today** 4:11 PM

 **David:** you finally have a day off?

  


**Today** 4:13 PM

 **Patrick:** Hey it’s my turn for a question

 **Patrick:** But yes, I’m mostly going to lounge around today

 **David:** you deserve it tbh

  


**Today** 4:15 PM

 **David:** so go ahead

  


**Today** 4:17 PM

 **Patrick:** You mentioned your sister, Alexis? Is she safe?

  


**Today** 4:19 PM

 **David:** oh going for another personal question huh

 **David:** yeah she’s safe

 **David:** at least i think she is

 **David:** her shipping heir boyfriend was about to take her on a trip from LA

 **David:** my parents also happened to be there as well since my mom got a commercial offer or something

 **David:** they somehow managed to get into the same underground colony place

 **David:** the last i heard from her was from my phone

  


**Today** 4:23 PM

 **David:** i tried texting her and calling my parents from this phone every other day but it goes straight to voicemail

 **David:** it’s concerning but there’s nothing i can do about it

  


**Today** 4:25 PM

 **Patrick:** I’m sure they’re fine

 **Patrick:** If it’s an underground colony they probably don’t have cell service

 **Patrick:** I could ask around for you about them if you want?

  


**Today** 4:27 PM

 **David:** really?

 **David:** you don’t have to go through all this trouble

 **Patrick:** Not at all. I told you I want to help however I can

 **Patrick:** What’s your last name? Mine’s Brewer

  


**Today** 4:29 PM

 **David:** Patrick Brewer

 **David:** i like that

  


**Today** 4:31 PM

 **David:** My last name is Rose

 **David:** my parents are Johnny and Moira

  


**Today** 4:33 PM

 **Patrick:** Wait

  


**Patrick:** THE Johnny Rose?

 **Patrick:** Your dad owns Rose Video??

 **David:** lmao and here we go

  


**Today** 4:35 PM

 **Patrick:** No it’s just that I used to work at a Rose Video back in high school

 **Patrick:** So... I know of your parents because of those training videos they did

 **David:** oh god those

  


**Today** 4:37 PM

 **David:** ha what a small world huh

 **David:** well now that you know

 **David:** you’re probably gonna google me and regret ever talking to me

  


**Today** 4:39 PM

 **Patrick:** Why would I regret?

  


**Today** 4:41 PM

 **David:** excuse me have you not read the news?

 **David:** not to brag

 **David:** but not everyone’s love life is publicized by bitter exes that have a penchant for writing medium articles

 **David:** it’s not easy having all of your bad choices publicly documented on social media for the world to see

  


**Today** 4:43 PM

 **Patrick:** David, listen

 **Patrick:** I’m not going to google you unless you want me to

 **Patrick:** I honestly don’t care what others say about you in the past

 **Patrick:** I think you’re great

 **Patrick:** That’s all that matters to me

  


**Today** 4:46 PM

 **David:** you’re the first person to ever say that to me

 **Patrick:** It’s the truth

  


**Today** 4:49 PM

 **Patrick:** Anyway, I’ll ask around to see how your family is

 **Patrick:** Maybe try to get them to call you

 **David:** you really don’t have to

  


**Today** 4:51 PM

 **Patrick:** David

 **Patrick:** You’re going to have to get used to people being nice to you

 **Patrick:** Because you deserve to be treated with that much decency

 **Patrick:** So let me do this for you, okay?

  


**Today** 4:53 PM

 **David:** okay

 **David:** thank you

  


**Today** 4:57 PM

 **Patrick:** I believe it’s your turn for a question

  


**Today** 4:59 PM

 **David:** hmm

  


**Today** 5:02 PM

 **David:** what’s your favorite place in Schitt’s Creek?

  


**Today** 5:04 PM

 **Patrick:** Okay I have to pass on this one 

**Patrick:** I can’t tell you that

  


**Today** 5:06 PM

 **David:** what. no!!

 **David:** why not?

  


**Today** 5:09 PM

 **Patrick:** I was hoping to take you there myself

  


**Today** 5:12 PM

 **David:** i can’t even enjoy this nice moment for more than a couple minutes

 **Patrick:** What? 

  


**Today** 5:14 PM

 **David:** Patrick i need you to draft a route for me

 **David:** now, please

  


**Today** 5:15 PM

 **Patrick:** At this rate you can only travel for two hours

 **David:** good enough for me

  


**Today** 5:18 PM

 **Patrick:** Here

 **David:** thanks

  


**Today** 6:32 PM

 **David:** so i saw a shadow pass by the living room window a couple of times

 **David:** i have the curtains drawn btw

 **David:** seemed human at least

  


**Today** 6:34 PM

 **David:** it felt off so i packed and ran

  


**Today** 6:36 PM

 **David:** i never thought that my past junkie days of knowing how to look for exits would come in handy like this

  


**Today** 6:38 PM

 **Patrick:** I don’t know what’s more mortifying

 **Patrick:** That sentence or the fact that someone was potentially stalking you?

  


**Today** 6:41 PM

 **David:** oh. my panic attack?

 **David:** it’s back

  


**Today** 6:43 PM

 **Patrick:** You need to breathe David, remember deep breaths

  


**Today** 6:45 PM

 **David:** yeah yeah

  


**Today** 6:49 PM

 **David:** oh gross

  


**Today** 6:51 PM

 **David:** i wonder what it says about me that i’m more terrified of a living person than i am of a pack of dead ones

 **Patrick:** Did you just

  


**Today** 6:54 PM

 **David:** yep

 **David:** this is some getting your Uber to pull over so you don’t ruin the car vibes

 **Patrick:** You have to let it all out

 **Patrick:** It’s the only way to get rid of the feeling

  


**Today** 6:58 PM

 **Patrick:** Are you feeling better?

  


**Today** 7:00 PM

 **David:** i hate this i fucking hate this

  


**Patrick:** I know. I know

  


**Today** 7:03 PM

 **Patrick:** You’re really brave David, you know that?

 **David:** don’t feel like it

  
  
  


**Patrick:** You are

  


**Today** 7:05 PM

 **Patrick:** You can do this

  


**Patrick:** I’m here for you

  


**Today** 7:07 PM

 **David:** you’re the only reason i’m even doing this

 **Patrick:** Aren’t you doing it for the pizza?

 **David:** honestly i just want to see you

  


**Today** 7:09 PM

 **Patrick:** You’ll get to see me very soon

 **Patrick:** Be brave for me David

  


**Today** 7:11 PM

 **Patrick:** And for the pizza

  


**Today** 7:13 PM

 **David:** 😂

  


**Today** 7:16 PM

 **David:** okay i’m good to go

 **David:** get back to you in an hour or so

  


**Today** 7:18 PM

 **Patrick:** Okay

  


**Today** 8:23 PM

 **David:** again i had to try several neighborhoods

 **David:** sorry i took a while

  


**Today** 8:28 PM

 **David:** IMG_2020052622.jpg

 **David:** at least this house aligns with my taste

  


**Today** 8:30 PM

 **Patrick:** I wasn’t aware that you liked cottages 

  


**Today** 8:32 PM

 **David:** why wouldn’t i?

 **Patrick:** Thought you’d be the high end condo type 

  


**Today** 8:34 PM

 **David:** oh i wouldn’t turn down a spacious minimalist condo

 **David:** preferences can vary, Patrick

  
  
  


**Patrick:** I’m aware

  


**Today** 8:38 PM

 **Patrick:** IMG_2020040247.jpg

  


**Patrick:** This is our town sign

  


**Today** 8:40 PM

 **David:** what in the actual fuck am i looking at

 **David:** that can’t be real

  


**Today** 8:42 PM

 **Patrick:** Oh it is

  


**Patrick:** That’s his sister btw

  


**Today** 8:44 PM

 **David:** well the uncomfortable factor went from 20 to incest

  


**Today** 8:46 PM

 **David:** you said you were going to take me to your favorite place?

 **David:** now you got me worried about the taste levels of this town 

**Patrick:** It’s nowhere near as hilarious as the sign

  


**Today** 8:48 PM

 **David:** please don’t tell me it’s on a mountain or whatever

 **Patrick:** You have a fear of heights?

  


**Today** 8:50 PM

 **David:** you might think less of me but yes

 **Patrick:** It’s a common phobia. Nothing to be ashamed of

  


**Today** 8:53 PM

 **Patrick:** But no, it’s not on a mountain

  


**Today** 8:58 PM

 **Patrick:** David I already told you I won’t tell you what it is stop guessing

 **Patrick:** You’ll find out when you get here

  


**Today** 9:00 PM

 **David:** i trust you and everything but uh

 **David:** it takes a lot to impress me

 **Patrick:** Well if the place ends up being disappointing

 **Patrick:** I hope at least the company won’t be

  


**Today** 9:03 PM

 **David:** i’ll turn off this phone if you tell me the place is you

 **Patrick:** Okay that is the lamest thing I’ve ever heard

 **Patrick:** I’m offended you think my humor is that cheap

 **David:** you can never be too careful these days

  


**Today** 9:06 PM

 **David:** fine i’ll stop guessing

  


**Today** 9:09 PM

 **David:** can i ask another question then

 **David:** since the last one was unanswered

 **Patrick:** Yeah sure

  


**Today** 9:12 PM

 **David:** Who were you before all this? Mr Patrick Brewer?

 **David:** you were engaged to a woman and…?

  


**Today** 9:14 PM

 **Patrick:** Well I had just graduated with an MBA and was working as a business consultant at a small firm in my hometown

  


**Today** 9:16 PM

 **David:** a business major

 **David:** wow

 **David:** why does that seem so fitting

  


**Today** 9:18 PM

 **Patrick:** Do I give off a bad vibe or something?

 **Patrick:** I know business school breeds those typical douchebags and whatnot but

 **David:** no! it’s just the way you go about things

 **David:** you always seem so prepared and confident

  


**Today** 9:21 PM

 **Patrick:** Oh I seem confident to you do I?

 **David:** okay let’s not get cocky

  


**Today** 9:23 PM

 **Patrick:** What about you? What did you do in New York?

  


**Today** 9:25 PM

 **David:** i owned an art gallery in SoHo

  


**Today** 9:27 PM

 **Patrick:** Oh right you mentioned earlier that you bought your friends’ art

 **David:** ugh yeah that

 **David:** she wanted her installation to be a permanent staple in my gallery

 **David:** it was atrocious but she was a friend so i just went with it

  


**Today** 9:30 PM

 **Patrick:** That’s really nice of you David

  


**Today** 9:32 PM

 **David:** hardly

 **David:** my friends and exes were either bought with money or other means

 **David:** no one actively chooses to associate with me

  


**Today** 9:34 PM

 **Patrick:** Well then explain me

 **Patrick:** I’m here associating with you aren’t I?

  


**Today** 9:36 PM

 **David:** you’re an anomaly

 **David:** the more you get to know me the less interested you’ll be

 **David:** trust me

  


**Today** 9:38 PM

 **Patrick:** I doubt it

  


**Today** 9:45 PM

 **David:** still feeling a little queasy from earlier

 **David:** think i’m gonna head to bed

 **Patrick:** Yeah get some rest

  


**Today** 9:50 PM

 **David:** talk to you tomorrow

 **David:** ‘night

  


**Today** 9:55 PM

 **Patrick:** Hope you dream of milking cows and fighting hens for their eggs

 **David:** you’re the worst

  


**Today** 9:59 PM

 **Patrick:** Sweet dreams!

  


**Patrick:** Goodnight

  



	14. May 27 2020

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Oh it wasn’t the hens-- it was the geese"

**10:18 PM** **17%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 7:05 AM

 **David:** surprise surprise

 **David:** i’m up

  


**Today** 7:07 AM

 **Patrick:** You’re up already?! At 7?

 **Patrick:** What happened to no physical activity before 10

  


**Today** 7:09 AM

 **David:** figured i’m overdue for some cardio

 **Patrick:** But you don’t do cardio

  


**Today** 7:12 AM

 **David:** i’m just trying to put as much distance as i can from yesterday

 **Patrick:** Let me draft your route

  


**Today** 7:14 AM

 **Patrick:** You’re feeling okay though?

 **David:** i’m great

 **David:** why wouldn’t i be?

  


**Today** 7:16 AM

 **Patrick:** Just making sure

 **Patrick:** I don’t want you to overexert yourself

  


**Today** 7:19 AM

 **Patrick:** If this is too much let me know

 **Patrick:** Since it’s a longer trip

 **Patrick:** I’d advise you to take more but shorter breaks

  


**Today** 7:21 AM

 **David:** i’ll try to take shorter breaks

 **David:** can’t guarantee anything though

  


**Today** 7:23 AM

 **Patrick:** The fact that you’re willing to try is good enough for me

 **David:** you’ve got low standards

 **Patrick:** Pretty sure my standards are high

 **Patrick:** The David I knew three days ago wouldn’t willingly wake up this early

 **David:** touché

  


**Today** 7:27 AM

 **David:** alright i’m off

  


**Today** 7:29 AM

 **David:** are you busy today?

  


**Patrick:** Not really

 **Patrick:** Just the standard watch shift, making rounds

 **David:** okay

  


**Today** 7:32 AM

 **Patrick:** If I don’t respond within 15 minutes, don’t worry

 **Patrick:** I’m probably just in the middle of a proximity clean up

  


**Today** 7:34 AM

 **David:** you don’t have to be so delicate around me

 **David:** i don’t need you to hold my hand

 **Patrick:** I know you can handle yourself. I just don’t want you to feel like you have to

 **Patrick:** We don’t talk about it but I’m well aware of what your environment looks like

  


**Today** 7:36 AM

 **David:** it’s grotesque but it’s the new norm

 **David:** if i don’t get used to it then i’d never make any progress

  


**Today** 7:38 AM

 **David:** but here’s something

 **David:** the roads aren’t too bad here

 **David:** still a lot of abandoned cars but very little bodies

 **David:** at least i’m not seeing piles like i was before 

  


**Today** 7:40 AM

 **Patrick:** Don’t let your guard down

 **David:** i won’t

  


**Today** 12:31 PM

 **David:** it’s lunch time

 **David:** IMG_202052710.jpg

 **David:** golf makes no sense but hey, picnic tables

  


**Today** 12:33 PM

 **Patrick:** Oh you made a lot of progress!

  


**Today** 12:35 PM

 **David:** does that mean i get to ask a question

 **David:** you know, as my reward

  


**Today** 12:37 PM

 **Patrick:** Honestly how could I deprive you of that

 **Patrick:** After all, it’s all I can offer right now

  


**Today** 12:39 PM

 **Patrick:** Hit me

  


**Today** 12:42 PM

 **David:** so can you teach me how to kill a zombie?

  


**Today** 12:44 PM

 **Patrick:** Never thought you’d ask me this question

 **Patrick:** Unusual for you, but i’m digging the energy

 **David:** i’d prefer not to kill anything

 **David:** but given the circumstances, i’d be stupid to be this naive

  


**Today** 12:46 PM

 **Patrick:** I don’t know why I was hoping to delay this part but we can’t

  


**Today** 12:48 PM

 **Patrick:** Weapon of choice then?

  


**Today** 12:50 PM

 **David:** easy to carry around

 **David:** so a bat maybe?

  


**Today** 12:52 PM

 **Patrick:** Okay that’s a decent choice

 **Patrick:** Remember Negan from The Walking Dead?

 **Patrick:** His infamous barbed wire bat?

 **David:** i only know about the show but i never watched it

  


**Today** 12:55 PM

 **Patrick:** Okay well try to find nails or barbed wire to embed on the bat

 **Patrick:** It’s more lethal that way

  


**Today** 12:57 PM

 **David:** i’m already regretting asking about this

 **David:** is there a weapon you’d recommend instead

 **David:** and please don’t say gun

  


**Today** 12:59 PM

 **Patrick:** Honestly? I’d say pickaxe

 **Patrick:** You swing them like you would a bat and it gets the job done quick

 **Patrick:** I carry mine around for rounds

  


**Today** 1:01 PM

 **David:** right

 **David:** second best weapon then?

 **Patrick:** Um. A sledge hammer

 **Patrick:** Weapons with a long handle and a metal head are all good choices

  


**Today** 1:04 PM

 **David:** what if i can’t find either of those things

 **Patrick:** Then a shovel

  


**Today** 1:06 PM

 **David:** i’ll try looking for that

 **David:** i think there’s a shed that belongs to the golf course up ahead

  


**Today** 1:13 PM

 **David:** IMG_2020052716.jpg

 **David:** shovel acquired

  
  


**Patrick:** Excellent

  


**Today** 1:16 PM

 **Patrick:** Now, what you do is you either aim for the neck or between the eyes

 **Patrick:** You can swing it like a sword, but that requires some aiming practice and enough force

 **Patrick:** because if you don’t swing it right, it just ends up getting lodged in the body making you prone to getting bit or scratched

  


**Today** 1:18 PM

 **Patrick:** So you should go the old fashioned way which is to knock them over and drive the shovel through the skull with your foot

 **Patrick:** But this only works if you’re dealing with one

 **David:** okay so do i just aim for the head and like? knock them over??

  


**Today** 1:20 PM

 **Patrick:** Actually you just reminded me that we have a couple videos of Ronnie and Twyla demonstrating how do kill them efficiently

 **Patrick:** It’s for newcomers that want to join the watch shift

 **Patrick:** It’s pretty gory, FYI

  


**Today** 1:24 PM

 **Patrick:** 293741_73895.mov

 **Patrick:** I’ll just send you the pickaxe one

 **Patrick:** Copy what Twyla does in the first 30 seconds, and then use the boot method

  


**Today** 1:27 PM

 **David:** oh my god

  


**Today** 1:29 PM

 **David:** she’s... incredible

  


**Today** 1:31 PM

 **Patrick:** She’s actually our sharpshooter

 **Patrick:** Hard to believe she’s very bubbly and sweet outside of this thing huh

 **David:** i'm kinda scared to meet her

  


**Today** 1:33 PM

 **David:** they can’t possibly be that easy to trip over

  


**Today** 1:35 PM

 **Patrick:** Notice how she kind of taunts the guy? She would line herself up in his scent path and sight so he would move faster

 **Patrick:** Then she just ducks and swings as hard as she can at his knee caps and bam

 **Patrick:** Down he goes

  


**Today** 1:37 PM

 **Patrick:** The second he hits the floor you wedge your shovel down

 **Patrick:** Job finished

  


**Today** 1:39 PM

 **David:** ugh i don’t know if i can do this

 **Patrick:** I hope you don’t have to

 **Patrick:** The trainees get to practice on a few stray ones with us

 **Patrick:** And even then it takes them at least 3 to 4 bodies to get the hang of

  


**Today** 1:41 PM

 **Patrick:** But just in case you come across a solitary one that is too close for you to run from

 **Patrick:** You’ll need to protect yourself

  


**Today** 1:43 PM

 **Patrick:** And if necessary

 **Patrick:** You might need to use it on a person

 **David:** god no

 **David:** hope it never comes to that

  


**Today** 1:48 PM

 **Patrick:** Alright reward time over

 **Patrick:** I might’ve spoiled you a little there

 **David:** i know you can’t help it

 **David:** though idk if talking about zombie fighting makes for good conversation but whatever

  


**Today** 1:51 PM

 **Patrick:** Keep going David ;)

 **David:** okay no winky faces omg

  


**Today** 4:33 PM

 **David:** um there’s a guy in the distance

 **David:** i don’t know if i should ignore him and keep walking or...

  


**Today** 4:35 PM

 **Patrick:** Is he’s alone?

  


**Today** 4:37 PM

 **David:** seems like it

 **David:** i can’t tell if he’s a human or a zombie

 **David:** he can’t be one of those bait people could he

 **Patrick:** I don’t know

 **Patrick:** You’re not armed or have a lot of resources on you there’s technically no need for an entire group to focus on you

 **Patrick:** Why don’t you try avoiding him

  


**Today** 4:39 PM

 **David:** fuck he waved at me

 **David:** he’s coming over

  


**Today** 4:46 PM

 **David:** IMG_2020052721.jpg

 **David:** IMG_2020052723.jpg

 **David:** sneaked a few pics

 **David:** his name is Troy

  


**Today** 4:48 PM

 **Patrick:** Where did he come from?

 **David:** he said he was camping around the area

 **David:** originally from Gaines or something

  


**Today** 4:50 PM

 **David:** asked if he could travel with me since i have a phone

 **David:** told him i’m just winging it atm

 **David:** heading to the next town

  


**Today** 4:52 PM

 **Patrick:** Tell him you’re traveling up north because it’s harder for the undead to be active in colder climates

 **David:** wait is that true?

  


**Today** 4:54 PM

 **Patrick:** It is

  


**Patrick:** Obviously SC isn’t cold enough but I know there’s a town or two further north from us that are doing well in terms of smaller horde numbers

 **Patrick:** But they struggle with resources a lot more

  


**Today** 4:59 PM

 **David:** asked Troy to walk on the outer lane since he keeps wanting to look over at my phone

 **David:** he’s creeping me out

 **Patrick:** Tell him to keep his distance

 **Patrick:** Personal space and all

  


**Today** 5:05 PM

 **David:** he’s kinda limping

 **David:** but he says he just twisted his ankle

 **David:** i can’t ask him to prove to me he’s not bitten that’s stupid

 **David:** judging by how you’ve told me people behave

 **Patrick:** Yes smart thinking

 **Patrick:** I know we never made it a rule but if you feel like you’re in danger, call me

 **Patrick:** It doesn’t matter when, I’ll answer

  


**Today** 5:08 PM

 **David:** okay

  


**Today** 5:10 PM

 **David:** are you out on your rounds?

 **Patrick:** No, I’m still on watch but I’ll need to do rounds later

 **Patrick:** Why? Are you feeling unsafe?

  


**Today** 5:12 PM

 **David:** when am i ever safe lol

 **David:** i want to keep talking to you

  


**Today** 5:14 PM

 **Patrick:** You know what I’ll trade in a favor today

 **Patrick:** I’ll stick on watch so I can keep you company

 **David:** really?

  


**Today** 5:16 PM

 **Patrick:** Yeah. I’ll just say my shoulder is acting up a little so I want to rest

 **David:** your shoulder?

  
  
  
  


**Patrick:** Don’t worry it’s not recent

 **Patrick:** It’s an old sports injury that I’ve taken care of but sometimes it can hurt

  


**Today** 5:19 PM

 **David:** mr goody two shoes lying for me

 **David:** what a gentleman

 **Patrick:** Is it really a lie if it’s technically the truth?

  


**Today** 5:31 PM

 **David:** Troy keeps asking me why i’m on my phone

 **David:** typically i’d be rude and tell him to mind his own business

 **David:** but i don’t have a death wish

 **David:** so told him i’m texting family that’s also making their way up north and using google maps

 **Patrick:** Good answer. I like that I’m family

  


**Today** 5:33 PM

 **Patrick:** Can you tell if his breathing is labored or if he’s sweating a lot?

 **David:** i'm also breathing hard and sweating

 **David:** it’s hard to tell at this point

  


**Today** 5:36 PM

 **Patrick:** If he starts to pant heavily and looks incredibly pale, then you’ll know

  
  


**David:** god

  


**Today** 5:38 PM

 **Patrick:** I really didn’t want you to find out about the turning process like this

 **David:** so how long does the process last?

 **Patrick:** It depends on the proximity of the bite, the further away from the brain, the slower they’ll turn

 **Patrick:** From our reports it lasts from approximately a day to four days

 **Patrick:** Then they go into their dormant stage which lasts for around 12 hours

 **David:** good to know

  


**Today** 5:41 PM

 **David:** ugh he’s rambling on and on about random things

 **David:** i really... don’t care

 **David:** like to travel in silence thanks

  


**Today** 5:43 PM

 **Patrick:** tell him that noise attracts the undead so he should keep quiet

  


**Today** 5:45 PM

 **David:** oh that shut him up lol

 **Patrick:** Haha you can’t pick and choose your travel companion

 **David:** i already have a travel companion i don’t need two

  


**Today** 5:48 PM

 **Patrick:** If I was as talkative as this guy was I’m sure you’d be just as annoyed

 **David:** you can talk my ears off honestly

  


**Today** 5:50 PM

 **Patrick:** Okay if I started talking about business you’d hate it

 **Patrick:** Or sports

 **David:** i’ll be mildly annoyed but i won’t kick you out of bed

  


**Today** 5:52 PM

 **Patrick:** Oh? 

  


**Patrick:** I’m in bed with you in this scenario?

  


**Today** 5:54 PM

 **David:** i

  


**David:** ok uhhhh you know what i meant!!

 **David:** fuck how am i putting my foot in my mouth through TEXT

  


**Today** 5:56 PM

 **Patrick:** I’m relieved to see you’re more relaxed now

 **David:** shut up

 **David:** i’m busy walking

  


**Today** 7:19 PM

 **David:** we’ve arrived in town

 **David:** i guess it is helpful to have another person around to help check which places are unlocked

  


**Today** 7:30 PM

 **David:** found a place

 **David:** oh there’s no food in this one

 **David:** damn it

  


**Today** 7:34 PM

 **Patrick:** Troy has food though?

  


**Today** 8:42 PM

 **David:** i gave him some of mine but i told him that’s all i had left

 **David:** as a trade i get the master bedroom

 **David:** ugh i need to get clean

  


**Today** 8:44 PM

 **Patrick:** He knows what to do?

 **David:** yeah i told him not to turn on the lights and to draw the curtains

 **David:** and also lock the door to his room

 **David:** though that’s more for my sake than his

  


**Today** 8:47 PM

 **David:** it took forever to get him to leave me alone after dinner

 **David:** he kept going on and on about his family and whatnot

 **David:** told him i was exhausted after traveling to get away from him

  


**Today** 8:49 PM

 **Patrick:** You did make some impressive progress today

 **Patrick:** You should shower and get to bed

 **David:** i already showered

 **David:** just lying in bed now

  


**Today** 8:51 PM

 **Patrick:** Why don’t we end the day like we usually do?

 **Patrick:** Questions?

 **David:** okay

  


**Today** 8:54 PM

 **Patrick:** so.

 **David:** actually the more i think about it the question i had for you earlier shouldn’t count

 **David:** since it’s more of an educational inquiry than a question

 **David:** so technically it’s still my turn

  


**Today** 8:56 PM

 **Patrick:** I’ll take it

 **Patrick:** Frankly, I couldn’t think of a question for you so this all works out

  


**Today** 8:59 PM

 **David:** really

 **David:** no question for me?

 **David:** you’re not interested in learning more about me?

 **Patrick:** I’m in no rush

 **Patrick:** I could always ask you in person

 **Patrick:** Also gives me more time to think

  


**Today** 9:03 PM

 **Patrick:** So what’s your question?

  


**Today** 9:05 PM

 **David:** your hand

 **David:** if it wasn’t the hens then what happened?

  


**Today** 9:07 PM

 **Patrick:** Oh it wasn’t the hens-- it was the geese

 **David:** Patrick. seriously

  


**Today** 9:10 PM

 **Patrick:** Haha no the scars were from my early days of getting adjusted to clearing the proximity

 **Patrick:** I kept nicking myself like an idiot because I didn’t know how to use a knife

 **Patrick:** Most of them are just callouses from manual labor 

**Patrick:** It looks bad but they don’t actually hurt

  


**Today** 9:15 PM

 **David:** can’t keep my eyes open

 **David:** want to keep talking to you

  


**Today** 9:18 PM

 **David:** i like your hands

 **David:** they’re so ruggedly sexy

  


**Today** 9:22 PM

 **Patrick:** ………

  


**Patrick:** Uhh thanks??

  


**Today** 9:30 PM

 **Patrick:** David?

  


**Patrick:** Are you still awake?

  


**Today** 9:33 PM

 **Patrick:** Talk to you tomorrow

  



	15. May 28 2020

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Just remember you can call me"

**9:19 PM** **77%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 6:47 AM

 **David:** good morning

 **David:** this waking up early thing is becoming a theme i’m not here for

 **Patrick:** Good morning

  


**Today** 6:50 AM

 **Patrick:** Sleep well?

 **David:** eh

  


**Today** 6:52 AM

 **Patrick:** Were my hands too distracting in your dreams or

  


**Today** 6:54 AM

 **David:** nnnn that didn’t happen!!!

 **Patrick:** you’re a lot more honest when you’re sleepy

  


**Today** 6:56 AM

 **David:** 😒

 **David:** don’t you dare start taking advantage of that

  


**Today** 6:58 AM

 **Patrick:** 😊

 **David:** i hate you so much right now

  


**Today** 7:05 AM

 **David:** so um

 **David:** not to alarm you

 **David:** but i’m having a bit of a crisis atm

 **Patrick:** What’s wrong?

 **Patrick:** Are you having another panic attack?

  


**Today** 7:07 AM

 **David:** no! no don’t worry nothing’s wrong

 **David:** it’s just that i uh

 **David:** i still don’t know if i’m comfortable traveling with Troy

 **Patrick:** Then ditch him

 **Patrick:** Trust your instincts. Isn’t that what kept you alive this whole time?

 **Patrick:** It’s still early enough right now so you probably could sneak out

 **Patrick:** Leave him in the house, you at least got him shelter and some food

  


**Today** 7:09 AM

 **David:** what?

 **David:** Patrick i can’t just abandon him

  


**Today** 7:11 AM

 **Patrick:** Between your comfort and safety and his wellbeing I’m prioritizing you

 **Patrick:** Doesn’t he give you bad vibes? Isn’t that reason enough

 **David:** how does that make me any different from my friends

 **David:** they abandoned me the first chance they got

  


**Today** 7:13 AM

 **Patrick:** Then don’t abandon him

 **Patrick:** David you have to make the call here

 **Patrick:** You know all I want is for you to be safe

  


**Today** 7:16 AM

 **David:** i just

 **David:** god i feel horrible for even thinking about wanting to ditch him

 **Patrick:** Sometimes you have to be selfish and look out for yourself

 **Patrick:** The whole situation is different, you shouldn’t feel bad

 **Patrick:** Do what feels right for you

  


**Today** 7:18 AM

 **David:** any time i spend here debating is time lost

 **David:** fine i’m gonna do it

  
  
  
  


**Patrick:** It’s okay, do it

  


**Today** 7:20 AM

 **David:** i’m going to leave the house and you can send me the route in a bit?

 **Patrick:** Yeah sure

  


**Today** 7:26 AM

 **David:** shit

 **David:** he’s already awake and sitting in the living room waiting for me???

 **Patrick:** Well! That isn’t creepy at all

  


**Today** 7:29 AM

 **David:** send the route through i guess

 **David:** don’t have much of a choice but to be stuck with him

  


**Today** 7:31 AM

 **Patrick:** Maybe you could try again tomorrow

  


**Today** 7:33 AM

 **David:** i have a feeling he’s caught on

  


**Today** 7:44 AM

 **David:** alright we’re off

  


**Today** 7:47 AM

 **David:** i’m gonna try to talk to you less in case he gets suspicious

  


**Today** 7:49 AM

 **Patrick:** Just remember you can call me

 **David:** yeah

  


**Today** 10:19 AM

 **David:** okay we’re taking a break

  


**Today** 10:22 AM

 **David:** i’m probably just freaking myself out but it feels like his limp is getting worse

 **Patrick:** He probably looks pretty bad too?

  


**Today** 10:24 AM

 **David:** mmm yeah

 **David:** i’m not standing too close to him though

 **Patrick:** It’s not like rabies where people go wild

 **Patrick:** They slow down, so you should be fine

 **Patrick:** But keep that distance

  


**Today** 10:27 AM

 **David:** i gave him some more of my food but he doesn’t seem to be eating much

 **Patrick:** You should limit your contact with him

 **David:** i’m trying

  


**Today** 10:36 AM

 **David:** okay we’re off again

  


**Today** 12:03 AM

 **David:** we’re taking far too many breaks

  


**Today** 2:26 PM

 **David:** uh Patrick?

 **David:** Troy’s taking a nap and i can’t wake him

  


**Today** 2:28 PM

 **David:** IMG_202005282.jpg

  


**Today** 2:30 PM

 **Patrick:** David. You need to go

  


**Patrick:** Now.

 **David:** oh

 **David:** okay. okay i’m walking

  


**Today** 2:34 PM

 **David:** he won’t catch up to me will he?

 **Patrick:** No. Don’t worry he won’t

 **Patrick:** As soon as you get to a divet in the road, walk above the original path

 **Patrick:** Google maps will lead you

  


**Today** 2:36 PM

 **David:** oh right

 **David:** the whole scent path thing

  


**Today** 2:39 PM

 **Patrick:** See

  


**Patrick:** You were right about him

 **Patrick:** Such good instincts

  


**Today** 2:41 PM

 **David:** stop teasing me

  


**Patrick:** I’m not!

 **Patrick:** It’s not a bad thing to be cautious, David

  


**Today** 2:44 PM

 **David:** paranoia isn’t a fun trait

 **David:** but thank you

 **Patrick:** It’s not paranoia if you’re right

  


**Today** 6:31 PM

 **David:** for all that trouble yesterday and today

 **David:** at least there’s still some luck left on my side

 **David:** got into the first house i found!

  


**Today** 6:33 PM

 **Patrick:** Nice!

  


**Patrick:** That must feel pretty great

 **David:** oh definitely

  


**Today** 6:42 PM

 **David:** wow boxes of protein bars AND juice?

 **David:** it really is my lucky day

  


**Today** 6:46 PM

 **David:** whew

 **David:** i can finally eat in peace

  


**Today** 6:48 PM

 **Patrick:** Protein bars

  


**Patrick:** Don’t miss those

 **David:** gotta eat what i can, right?

 **David:** can’t afford to be picky

  


**Today** 7:18 PM

 **David:** what are you having for dinner?

 **Patrick:** You sure you want to know?

  


**Today** 7:21 PM

 **David:** hey i’ll be having what you have soon enough won’t i?

  


**Patrick:** True

  


**Today** 7:23 PM

 **Patrick:** You can’t say that I’m tormenting you with this

 **Patrick:** IMG_2020052832.jpg

 **David:** mac and cheese?!

  
  
  
  
  


**Patrick:** You asked

  


**Today** 7:25 PM

 **David:** ugh yeah i did

  


**Today** 7:27 PM

 **Patrick:** It’s just a quick meal though

 **Patrick:** I have another shift tonight

 **David:** already?

 **David:** didn’t you just do a shift?

  


**Today** 7:29 PM

 **Patrick:** I traded my proximity check for you, remember?

 **David:** right. you did huh

  


**Today** 7:42 PM

 **David:** i just realized

 **David:** you always answer me so promptly

 **David:** when do you sleep??

 **Patrick:** What sleep? I don’t need sleep

 **Patrick:** I can sleep when I’m dead

 **Patrick:** Actually, Ronnie just switches out my battery pack

  


**Today** 7:46 PM

 **David:** don’t tell me i’ve been keeping you up

 **Patrick:** Well, yeah of course you have. It’s the least I can do

 **Patrick:** You know you’re going to have to make it up to me when you get here

  


**Today** 7:48 PM

 **David:** ummm

  


**Patrick:** I’m joking

 **Patrick:** I’m actually a light sleeper. Always have been

 **Patrick:** Though recent events have made it worse

 **Patrick:** What with the whole shift scheduling and other things

  


**Today** 7:51 PM

 **David:** didn’t you say you also do other work around town?

 **David:** then how much sleep are you actually getting??

 **Patrick:** Around 4 or so hours during the night

 **Patrick:** I’ll let you in on a little secret

 **Patrick:** When I can I also nap throughout the day

  


**Today** 7:56 PM

 **David:** oh so that’s what you’ve been doing while i’m walking

 **David:** no wonder you tell me to focus and not text

 **David:** it’s so you can nap

 **Patrick:** Like you, I do need my beauty sleep

 **Patrick:** You should focus on the road. You know you can’t afford to be distracted by your phone

  


**Today** 8:03 PM

 **David:** sigh

 **David:** another thing to look forward to when i get to Schitt’s Creek

 **David:** being abused by animals and sleep deprivation

  


**Today** 8:05 PM

 **David:** how are you not exhausted all the time?

 **Patrick:** I’m used to it

  
  
  
  


**Patrick:** Need to keep my mind busy

 **Patrick:** Helps takes the load off of some heavier stuff

  


**Today** 8:07 PM

 **David:** what heavier stuff?

 **Patrick:** Hey you reached your quota for tonight

 **David:** aw come on

  


**Today** 8:13 PM

 **Patrick:** Bed time for you

 **Patrick:** I’m sure you didn’t get any quality sleep yesterday

 **Patrick:** Rest up

 **David:** ughhh fine

 **David:** goodnight then

  


**Today** 8:17 PM

 **Patrick:** Don’t think too hard about my hands

 **David:** shut UP

 **David:** you’re never gonna let me live that down are you?

  


**Today** 8:19 PM

 **Patrick:** Oops it’s time for my shift!

  


**Patrick:** Goodnight David

 **David:** erghhhh

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delayed update! Had a bit of a bad start of the week unfortunately. Thank you all for your patience and support <3


	16. May 29 2020

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "brownie flavored chewy cardboard or apple pie flavored chewy cardboard?"

**3:05 PM** **27%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 9:13 AM

 **David:** good morning

 **David:** waking up at 9 is much better than 7

  


**Today** 9:18 AM

 **David:** did i actually manage to wake up before you?

 **David:** i hope you got a day to sleep in

  


**Today** 9:23 AM

 **David:** i’m gonna have breakfast

  


**Today** 9:26 AM

 **David:** which one should i have this morning?

 **David:** IMG_2020052948.jpg

 **David:** brownie flavored chewy cardboard or apple pie flavored chewy cardboard?

  


**Today** 9:40 AM

 **David:** finished eating

 **David:** gonna get ready

 **David:** you must be super busy with proximity cleaning

  


**Today** 9:55 AM

 **David:** okay it’s getting a bit late

 **David:** ooh did you lose your phone

 **David:** it’d be so funny if you did

  


**Today** 10:06 AM

 **David:** did your friends grab you up for an impromptu bar run and you’re passed out drunk?

 **David:** omg

  


**Today** 10:14 AM

 **David:** i’m gonna start walking

 **David:** let me know when you wake up or done working!

  


**Today** 10:38 AM

 **David:** i really don’t want to make a big deal about this

 **David:** but everything’s fine right?

 **David:** this is going to be so embarrassing when you respond later

  


**Today** 10:49 AM

 **David:** i kinda got the gist of how the routes work after you’ve guided me for the past couple of days

 **David:** i hope i know what i’m doing

 **David:** no hordes so far so i guess i’m doing it right?

  


**Today** 10:57 AM

 **David:** i’m probably overthinking this

 **David:** but did i say something wrong

 **David:** i finally got on your nerves didn’t i

 **David:** if i did please tell me

 **David:** you can be honest with me

 **David:** i’d much rather you tell me you’re done with me than to have something happen to you

  


**Today** 11:27 AM

 **David:** i know you said to call you if i’m in danger but i’m not in danger

 **David:** don’t get mad

  


**Today** 11:29 AM

 **David:** okay you’re not picking up

  


**Today** 11:42 AM

 **David:** i really hope you just lost your phone

 **David:** you’re probably frantically trying to find it

  


**Today** 12:39 PM

 **David:** i’m having lunch now

  


**Today** 12:41 PM

 **David:** they really got you so exhausted that you’re sleeping past noon huh

  


**Today** 12:50 PM

 **David:** i’m okay. i’m a lot more self sufficient than you think!

  


**Today** 12:56 PM

 **David:** i googled and Schitt’s Creek is above Toronto?

 **David:** i remember you said to go towards Toronto

 **David:** i’m gonna do that then

  


**Today** 1:14 PM

 **David:** i’m trying really hard not to freak out

  


**Today** 1:26 PM

 **David:** wow not now panic attack

 **David:** not a good time

  


**Today** 1:30 PM

 **David:** i’m doing that breathing exercise thing you told me to do

 **David:** deep breaths

 **David:** everything is going to be okay

 **David:** right Patrick?

  


**Today** 2:04 PM

 **David:** my instincts are telling me something’s wrong

 **David:** you said to trust my instincts, right?

 **David:** i feel like something’s wrong

 **David:** i don’t want to be right

 **David:** for once i don’t want my gut to be right

  


**Today** 2:11 PM

 **David:** can you please answer me

 **David:** please

 **David:** Patrick

 **David:** prove me wrong

  


**Today** 2:22 PM

 **David:** i’m gonna call you again

  


**Today** 2:45 PM

 **David:** i think there’s a RV in the distance??

 **David:** holy shit holy shit holy shit

 **David:** i’m in plain sight there’s nowhere for me to hide

 **David:** it’s driving towards me

  


**Today** 2:48 PM

 **David:** FUCK ME THERE’S TWO

  


**Today** 2:51 PM

 **David:** Patrick i really need you

 **David:** please please respond

  


**Today** 2:53 PM

 **David:** are they the looting gangs you warned me about

 **David:** fuck

  


**Today** 2:55 PM

 **David:** Patrick

 **David:** they’re getting closer

  


**Today** 2:57 PM

 **David:** i'm certain i’ll regret writing this

 **David:** but if i don’t tell you now i don’t think i’ll get a chance to

  


**Today** 2:59 PM

 **David:** you’re the most incredible person i’ve ever met

 **David:** you’re thoughtful and kind and sweet 

**David:** you do so much for me and ask for so little in return

 **David:** you’re the greatest friend someone could ever ask for

 **David:** i'm happy to have gotten to know you

 **David:** genuinely

 **David:** and i know i’m too emotional and got attached to you way too quickly

 **David:** but i think i’m in love with you?

 **David:** at least i think this is what being in love feels like

 **David:** i have very little experience in this area

 **David:** it’s been what, a week?

 **David:** you make it so easy for me to fall harder

 **David:** every day

 **David:** i just want you to know how i feel

 **David:** i guess this is goodbye then

 **David:** i’ll never know what you look like

 **David:** i know you also don’t know what i look like

 **David:** but i hope you’ll remember me

  


**Today** 3:04 PM

 **David:** see you in heaven

Delivered

  



	17. May 30 2020

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "but."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A special extra update. As a treat.

**1:33 AM** **34%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 12:09 AM

 **David:** i turned my phone off and hid it in the secret pocket of my backpack

 **David:** didn’t want them knowing i had something valuable on me

 **David:** didn’t want them knowing about you or Schitt’s Creek

  


**Today** 12:11 AM

 **David:** not gonna lie

 **David:** when i turned my phone back on i was hoping you’d respond

 **David:** and it’d be your turn to panic and blow up my phone

 **David:** but.

  


**Today** 12:24 AM

 **David:** hahaha oh well

  


**Today** 12:26 AM

 **David:** as you can see i’m not dead

 **David:** didn’t get murdered or robbed or worse

  


**Today** 12:28 AM

 **David:** turns out this group is really friendly

 **David:** it’s lead by a guy named Mutt and his girlfriend Tennessee

 **David:** they offered to drive me to Toronto

  


**Today** 12:30 AM

 **David:** they had so many stories about avoiding hordes

 **David:** they even narrowly escaped a hostile gang that tried to hijack their RV

 **David:** it was so fucking wild

  


**Today** 12:32 AM

 **David:** so now we’re spending the night out in the parking lot of a supermarket

 **David:** this is the first time in a week that i had a hot meal

 **David:** they bbq’d some mystery meat

 **David:** it was delicious, but i really don’t wanna know what it is

  


**Today** 12:34 AM

 **David:** they’re such a joyous bunch

 **David:** had a bit of a sing-along after dinner

 **David:** usually i’d get extreme secondhand embarrassment from people singing

 **David:** but it was so nice to hear some music

  


**Today** 12:39 AM

 **David:** we even watched a couple movies

 **David:** it was so ironic that of all the movies, they chose Shaun of the Dead

 **David:** but then we also watched Hot Fuzz

 **David:** someone in the group really likes Simon Pegg lol

 **David:** i bet you’d get along with them

  


**Today** 12:46 AM

 **David:** can you believe this is the first human interaction i’ve had for weeks

 **David:** outside of you, obviously

 **David:** it feels so normal

  


**Today** 12:49 AM

 **David:** they create such a relaxing atmosphere

 **David:** it’s like being with a bunch of friends on a cross-country road trip

 **David:** it’s so carefree i almost forgot we’re in the middle of an apocalypse

  


**Today** 12:56 AM

 **David:** they even cleared out a bunk for me to sleep in

 **David:** i think i can trust them, they also have phones so i don’t think they’ll take mine

 **David:** but i’m still typing under the blanket

 **David:** there are good people left in this world huh

 **David:** even if it was at the expense of losing you

  


**Today** 1:11 AM

 **David:** i wonder if texts get sent into other dimensions

 **David:** i hope all of this reaches you

  


**Today** 1:26 AM

 **David:** i miss you

Delivered

  



	18. May 30 2020 & May 31 2020

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "so i found out what the mystery meat was"

**3:11 AM** **68%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Yesterday** 7:24 AM

 **David:** WHAT THE FUCK

  


**Yesterday** 7:28 AM

 **David:** i just got woken up by gunshots

 **David:** holy shit

  


**Yesterday** 7:30 AM

 **David:** anyway

 **David:** good morning

  


**Yesterday** 9:13 AM

 **David:** i know i’m talking to myself at this point

 **David:** but you’ll indulge me, right?

  


**Yesterday** 9:16 AM

 **David:** so i found out what the mystery meat was

 **David:** it was deer

 **David:** they went hunting this morning and brought one back

 **David:** they asked if i wanted to help skin it

 **David:** i almost ran for the hills

  


**Yesterday** 9:52 AM

 **David:** we’re in town now

 **David:** we’re driving through and heading north

  


**Yesterday** 10:29 AM

 **David:** omg

 **David:** they just went into a Rose Video to steal dvds

 **David:** technically they didn’t steal since i watched them do it lmao

 **David:** but they don’t need to know that

  


**Yesterday** 10:44 AM

 **David:** IMG_2020053013.jpg

 **David:** their now prized tv series collection

  


**Yesterday** 11:07 AM

 **David:** getting a glimpse of their daily life

 **David:** we’re at a supermarket now "grocery shopping"

 **David:** i’m grabbing as many sweets as my pockets can carry

  


**Yesterday** 11:14 AM

 **David:** it smells awful in here

 **David:** fresh produce and meats are off the table

 **David:** but we got several carts full of canned goods

  


**Yesterday** 11:24 AM

 **David:** IMG_2020053022.jpg

 **David:** 5 pounds of assorted chocolates

 **David:** all mine

  


**Yesterday** 11:41 AM

 **David:** we’re doing laundry at the laundromat rn

 **David:** watching videos of that cute otter Kotaro to pass time

 **David:** I’m helping them out

 **David:** doing laundry as a bonding exercise?

 **David:** never knew this was a thing people do

 **David:** i like it

  


**Yesterday** 1:19 PM

 **David:** IMG_2020053032.jpg

 **David:** IMG_2020053035.jpg

 **David:** picnic by a pond with the food we got from the grocery store

 **David:** surprising there’s no bodies lying around

 **David:** it’s truly scenic

  


**Yesterday** 1:26 PM

 **David:** i wonder if there’s a place like this in Schitt’s Creek

 **David:** having a picnic with you sounds so lovely

  


**Yesterday** 1:38 PM

 **David:** IMG_2020053049.jpg

 **David:** Mutt’s on his guitar

  


**Yesterday** 3:45 PM

 **David:** left the park

 **David:** pit stop at the gas station

 **David:** they stocked up on more gas

  


**Yesterday** 3:53 PM

 **David:** i suggested that we spend the night at the Hilton

 **David:** i know Paris i’m sure she wouldn’t mind

  


**Yesterday** 4:07 PM

 **David:** they broke into the staff room and stole the master key

 **David:** penthouse suite here we come

  


**Yesterday** 5:49 PM

 **David:** did a couple rounds of pool

 **David:** not a fan of beer but we had so much fun

  


**Yesterday** 6:25 PM

 **David:** they found dry aged steak

 **David:** so some of them are in the kitchen cooking dinner right now

 **David:** i’m getting the drinks

 **David:** IMG_2020053056.jpg

 **David:** in another life, i’d live down here lol

 **David:** is it weird that i’d rather fend off hens for eggs in the morning over this?

  


**Yesterday** 8:42 PM

 **David:** these guys really know how to cook

 **David:** dinner was incredible

  


**Yesterday** 9:01 PM

 **David:** IMG_2020053062.jpg

 **David:** here’s a glass to you

 **David:** wish you were here with me

  


**Yesterday** 9:35 PM

 **David:** 847683_38592.mov

 **David:** watching them partying takes me back

  


**Yesterday** 9:47 PM

 **David:** you know

 **David:** i could see myself staying with them

 **David:** i feel like i belong

 **David:** it’s such a foreign feeling

  


**Yesterday** 9:56 PM

 **David:** Tennessee just asked if i wanted to join them

 **David:** almost brought me to tears

 **David:** but i told them i’m staying to wait for family

  


**Yesterday** 10:03 PM

 **David:** i’m still going to try and get to Schitt’s Creek

 **David:** i want to be where you are

 **David:** i’ll definitely find Ronnie and Twyla and ask them about you

 **David:** and we can rant about how lazy and unhelpful you are

  


**Yesterday** 11:11 PM

 **David:** usually i’d be drunk by now

 **David:** i can’t believe i’m only buzzed

  


**Yesterday** 11:20 PM

 **David:** some of them have passed out haha

 **David:** was this what it’s like with your friends at the bar?

  


**Yesterday** 11:23 PM

 **David:** reeeeally getting flashbacks of the old days

 **David:** Derek and Matt are really going at it with the making out

 **David:** Tennessee's friend Montana is stripping and her wife is egging her on

  


**Yesterday** 11:26 PM

 **David:** fyi there are three people here named after states

 **David:** there’s Tennessee, Montana, and Dakota

  


**Yesterday** 11:48 PM

 **David:** oh great now they’re jumping into the pool drunk

 **David:** this is getting super out of hand

 **David:** i’m fishing them out before someone drowns

 **David:** me, the responsible friend? who’da thought

  


**Today** 12:10 AM

 **David:** so Derek and Matt moved their making out sesh to the hot tub and they’re inviting me over

 **David:** i’d go

 **David:** but i’m not about to cheat on you

  


**Today** 1:32 AM

 **David:** finally everyone’s settled down

 **David:** they’re all asleep

  


**Today** 1:38 AM

 **David:** i wonder if this is what it feels like when you’re doing night shifts

 **David:** like the whole world is yours

 **David:** there’s such serenity and calmness in the silence 

  


**Today** 1:43 AM

 **David:** i think i finally understand what you meant about keeping your mind busy

  


**Today** 1:56 AM

 **David:** goodnight, Patrick

Delivered

  



	19. May 31 2020 (cont.)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "i have never screamed so loud in my life"

**11:47 PM** **93%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 10:42 AM

 **David:** haha everyone’s hungover

 **David:** but they’ve already cleaned up and getting ready to leave

  


**Today** 10:54 AM

 **David:** we exchanged numbers just to keep in touch

  


**Today** 11:05 AM

 **David:** they gave me a big ziplock bag of jerky

 **David:** my bag is stocked up now thanks to them breaking into the supermarket yesterday

  


**Today** 11:11 AM

 **David:** got a really nice group hug

  


**Today** 11:30 AM

 **David:** they left

 **David:** all alone again

  


**Today** 11:48 AM

 **David:** i think i’m gonna stick around for one more day

 **David:** you wouldn’t blame me for treating myself would you?

  


**Today** 12:12 PM

 **David:** IMG_2020053143.jpg

 **David:** look at that pool

 **David:** a swim feels like a good idea

  


**Today** 12:17 PM

 **David:** all i’m missing is a nice bottle of champagne

  


**Today** 1:34 PM

 **David:** i have never screamed so loud in my life

  


**Today** 1:39 PM

 **David:** this girl broke into the hotel

 **David:** i almost shit my pants and dropped my armful of booze

  


**Today** 1:43 PM

 **David:** granted she also cussed up a storm

 **David:** we ended up laughing hysterically in relief

 **David:** how is everyone around me good at lock picking

 **David:** i really need to learn how to do that

  


**Today** 1:47 PM

 **David:** her name is Stevie

 **David:** maybe because of Mutt and his friends and their infectious energy

 **David:** i’m feeling very trusting today

 **David:** so i invited her to stay in my suite

  


**Today** 2:38 PM

 **David:** she made ramen noodles

 **David:** since both of us don’t know how to cook

 **David:** freezer full of steak and we’re here eating ramen

 **David:** we’re more alike than i’d like to admit

  


**Today** 2:48 PM

 **David:** she figured out that the roof of the pool opens

 **David:** we ended up sunbathing by the pool and talking over champagne

  


**Today** 4:19 PM

 **David:** surprise

 **David:** she’s a Schitt’s Creek native

 **David:** what are the chances?

  


**Today** 4:35 PM

 **David:** what’s this thing with me and the residents of SC?

 **David:** we’ve only known each other for a couple hours and it’s like we’ve known each other for years?

  


**Today** 4:42 PM

 **David:** it’s probably too soon to call her my best friend

 **David:** but she’s the closest there is to one imo

  


**Today** 4:51 PM

 **David:** i’m trying to convince her to come with me

 **David:** she doesn’t see the point in heading back

 **David:** says there’s nothing there for her

 **David:** she asked me why i was so insistent on going

  


**Today** 5:19 PM

 **David:** told her i have someone there waiting for me

  


**Today** 5:37 PM

 **Patrick:** David

 **Patrick:** David oh my god I’m so glad you’re alright

 **Patrick:** I’m here

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Patrick:** I’m fine I’m so sorry

 **Patrick:** I didn’t mean to leave you hanging for so many days

 **Patrick:** God you must’ve been worried sick

  


**Today** 5:44 PM

 **Patrick:** David?

  


**Today** 5:49 PM

 **David:** mmm

 **David:** crying too hard

 **David:** can’t type

  


**Today** 5:51 PM

 **David:** i’m not dreaming right

 **David:** tell me i haven’t lost my mind and become delusional

 **Patrick:** You’re not dreaming

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Patrick:** I’m here

  


**Today** 5:58 PM

 **David:** Stevie was asking me why i burst into tears

 **David:** i told her i needed a moment alone and locked myself in the bathroom

  


**Today** 6:02 PM

 **Patrick:** I didn’t mean to make you cry

  


**Patrick:** I’m so sorry

 **Patrick:** Wait who’s Stevie? You’re not alone?

 **David:** i’ll explain later

 **David:** what happened to you

 **David:** i thought you died you know

 **David:** thought i lost you

  


**Today** 6:08 PM

 **Patrick:** I didn’t die

  


**Patrick:** But I sure got close

 **David:** that’s not comforting in the least

  


**Today** 6:13 PM

 **Patrick:** We had a hostile takeover of the town in the middle of the night

 **Patrick:** A group of people we let in a few days ago started to riot

 **Patrick:** We had to ring the alarm

 **Patrick:** Which triggered their group waiting outside of town to drive over in trucks to try and break through one of our side gates

  


**Today** 6:15 PM

 **Patrick:** It was horrible

 **Patrick:** Ronnie had to make the difficult call and we had to get rid of some people

 **David:** oh my god

  


**Today** 6:18 PM

 **Patrick:** I went to help on the outside

 **Patrick:** I got knocked out hahaha

 **Patrick:** They told me I was out for a while

 **Patrick:** When I woke up the next day I couldn’t find my phone

 **Patrick:** They insisted I stay under observation since I got a concussion

 **Patrick:** So I couldn’t leave my bed

 **Patrick:** The minute the doctor let me leave I went searching for my phone

 **Patrick:** It took forever to find it since it was dead

 **Patrick:** I looked everywhere

 **Patrick:** Finally found it outside like 20 minutes ago

 **Patrick:** I rushed back and cleaned it and plugged it in

 **Patrick:** Messaged you immediately when the phone was able to power on

  


**Today** 6:22 PM

 **Patrick:** I’m so sorry David

 **Patrick:** I was reckless and I should’ve been more careful

 **Patrick:** I didn’t mean to scare you like this

 **David:** it’s okay

 **David:** you don’t have to apologize to me

 **David:** as long as you're alive and not a zombie i don’t care

  


**Today** 6:27 PM

 **Patrick:** Are you okay? Did you stay in the original place?

 **David:** yeah yeah i’m fine

 **David:** i left where i was staying two days ago

 **David:** i know you said Troy wouldn’t catch up to me but i still wanted to keep moving

  


**Today** 6:30 PM

 **David:** i actually got rescued? by a wonderful group of people that were travelling around

 **David:** they picked me up and drove me to Toronto

 **David:** let me stay with them for a bit

 **David:** they just left this morning

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Patrick:** Oh thank god

 **Patrick:** I'm glad there are still good people around

 **Patrick:** Is this Stevie person one of them?

  


**Today** 6:34 PM

 **David:** oh yeah Stevie

 **David:** no she actually broke into the hotel i’m staying at

 **David:** she’s really funny but don’t tell her i said that

 **Patrick:** Oh you found a hotel? That’s good

 **Patrick:** Haha okay I won’t

  


**Today** 6:39 PM

 **David:** she’s knocking frantically at the door

 **David:** “you didn’t drown yourself in the tub did you”

 **David:** omg why is she like this

 **Patrick:** You should head out if you’re feeling better

 **Patrick:** I’m sure she’s worried about you

  


**Today** 6:43 PM

 **David:** my eyes are super puffy

 **David:** i came out of the bathroom and now she’s laughing at me

 **David:** rude

  


**Today** 6:46 PM

 **Patrick:** I’m sure you look adorable

 **David:** EW!

 **David:** i told you not to call me that

  


**Today** 6:51 PM

 **David:** you’re not up and working are you? doesn’t your head hurt?

 **Patrick:** God no. They wouldn’t be that cruel to me

 **Patrick:** My head is killing me but I had to find my phone

 **Patrick:** I didn’t want to make you worry

  


**Today** 6:53 PM

 **David:** stop worrying about me and worry about yourself

 **David:** jesus Patrick

  


**Today** 6:55 PM

 **Patrick:** The upper left half of my face is kind of swollen

 **Patrick:** Hope that doesn’t affect your first impression of me

 **David:** nah you got it in a fight

 **David:** kinda hot ngl

  


**Today** 6:58 PM

 **Patrick:** My head’s already big don’t make it bigger

  


**Today** 7:03 PM

 **David:** where are you?

 **Patrick:** I’m in my bunk in the living quarters

 **Patrick:** Resting my head

  


**Today** 7:06 PM

 **David:** the screen must hurt your eyes

 **David:** you should stop talking to me

  


**Today** 7:09 PM

 **Patrick:** I can’t seem to stop

  


**Patrick:** The pain is worth it

 **David:** you’re incorrigible

  


**Today** 7:12 PM

 **Patrick:** If it’ll make you worry less

 **Patrick:** I’ll rest my eyes like you asked

 **David:** good

  


**Today** 8:53 PM

 **Stevie:** so THIS is who made David ugly cry like an actor during Oscars season

  


**Today** 8:57 PM

 **Patrick:** Huh?

  


**Today** 8:59 PM

 **Stevie:** “she’s really funny but don’t tell her i said that”

 **Stevie:** wow is he for real

  


**Today** 9:06 PM

 **Patrick:** I’m assuming this is Stevie?

 **Patrick:** I suppose it’s too late to ask you to not scroll up?

 **Stevie:** ding ding ding

  


**Today** 9:09 PM

 **Patrick:** I’m glad David has someone that gets him with him right now though

  


**Today** 9:11 PM

 **Stevie:** ewww you too?

 **Stevie:** no wonder he grins so hard his dimples are drilling holes in his face when he talks to you

 **Stevie:** you really are meant for each other

 **Patrick:** He has dimples?

 **Stevie:** you didn’t know?

 **Stevie:** OH MY GOD

  


**Today** 9:13 PM

 **Patrick:** Tell me more about his features

 **Stevie:** omfg dude get a grip

  


**Today** 9:16 PM

 **Stevie:** i can’t believe you guys haven’t exchanged selfies yet

 **Stevie:** you two are so weird

 **Patrick:** We’re waiting to see each other in person

 **Stevie:** i think i’m about to hurl

  


**Today** 9:20 PM

 **Patrick:** How did you manage to get his phone?

  


**Today** 9:24 PM

 **Stevie:** he’s in the shower

 **Stevie:** be prepared for a boyfriend that takes an hour and a half getting ready for bed buddy

 **Stevie:** i wonder how well that will go over back in Schitt’s Creek

  


**Today** 9:26 PM

 **Patrick:** He’s not my boyfriend

 **Patrick:** And he can take however long he likes

  


**Today** 9:29 PM

 **Stevie:** you’re absolutely whipped aren’t you

 **Stevie:** ~not my boyfriend~ my ass

  


**Today** 9:38 PM

 **Stevie:** judging by this convo i’m assuming you haven’t gotten the chance to read what he wrote while you were MIA?

 **Patrick:** I was more focused on David

 **Patrick:** I’ll read his texts in a bit

  


**Today** 9:40 PM

 **Stevie:** you’re in for a big surprise 😈

  


**Today** 9:42 PM

 **Stevie:** can’t believe he talked me into heading back to Schitt’s Creek with him

 **Stevie:** you better make it worth my while

  


**Today** 9:46 PM

 **Patrick:** What could I possibly offer you?

 **Stevie:** treat him right

 **Stevie:** or i’ll make sure you get more than a concussion

  


**Today** 9:49 PM

 **Patrick:** You’re a good friend

 **Stevie:** oh shut up

  


**Today** 9:52 PM

 **Patrick:** How come you didn’t contact us we could’ve tried to get some help for you

 **Stevie:** didn’t think anyone cared that i was missing

 **Stevie:** plus i left my phone in my car when i tried to run from a swarm of zombies

  


**Today** 9:54 PM

 **Stevie:** oh he’s coming out now bye 😉

  


**Patrick:** Bye

  


**Today** 10:02 PM

 **David:** THE FUCK

  


**Patrick:** Oh no

  
  


**Patrick:** Don’t hurt her David she means well

  


**Today** 10:06 PM

 **David:** how in the fuck did she guess my pin

 **David:** omg this slimy bitch just escaped to the bathroom i’m going to leave her behind

 **Patrick:** David stop making me laugh

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Patrick:** My head ow

  


**Today** 10:09 PM

 **David:** omg is she serious with the “treat him right” thing

 **David:** i’m never telling her things again

 **Patrick:** Just looking out for you like a good friend does

  


**Today** 10:12 PM

 **David:** good friends don’t rat each other out

  


**Today** 10:16 PM

 **Patrick:** it’s not a big deal if you take two hours getting ready for bed

 **Patrick:** You can just do a penalty shift for using up all the hot water

  


**Today** 10:18 PM

 **Patrick:** But I am curious as to what you’re doing in there that takes two hours

  


**Today** 10:21 PM

 **David:** i’m going to bed

 **David:** goodnight

  
  


**Patrick:** No wait I’m kidding!

  
  


**Patrick:** Goodnight I guess

  


**Today** 11:38 PM

 **David:** i’m really glad you’re okay

 **David:** really glad

  
  


**Patrick:** I’m glad I’m okay too

  



	20. June 1 2020

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Really, you missed me that much?"

**11:49 PM** **29%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 2:13 PM

 **David:** morning

  


**Today** 2:17 PM

 **David:** is it already two in the afternoon…?

  


**Today** 2:19 PM

 **Patrick:** Last I checked, yep

 **Patrick:** I didn’t want to disturb you

 **Patrick:** I figured you needed the sleep

  


**Today** 2:22 PM

 **David:** well i do love these hotel beds

 **David:** best sleep i’ve had all week

  


**Today** 2:24 PM

 **Patrick:** Really, you missed me that much?

  


**Today** 2:26 PM

 **David:** umm

 **David:** could i ask you not to read those past texts

  


**Today** 2:28 PM

 **Patrick:** Too late

  


**Today** 2:30 PM

 **Patrick:** Woke up pretty early today

 **Patrick:** Caught up to everything

  


**Today** 2:33 PM

 **David:** please don’t take it too seriously

 **David:** i was all alone and i was high on adrenaline

 **David:** you know how i overreact

 **David:** it’s not a big deal

 **David:** just me rambling it’s not important

  


**Today** 2:36 PM

 **Patrick:** David there’s nothing to be embarrassed about

  


**Today** 2:38 PM

 **Patrick:** I feel the same way too

  


**Today** 2:40 PM

 **Patrick:** The day I was stuck in bed, all I could think about was you

 **Patrick:** I was so scared that you were in danger

 **Patrick:** But I was even more terrified that my silence made you believe that I’d abandoned you like everyone else in your life did

 **Patrick:** I would never but how could I tell you that?

 **Patrick:** You said it took you a week to fall in love with me

 **Patrick:** Did you know that I already fell when I read your texts before we talked

 **Patrick:** When I kissed Jake you were the one on my mind

 **Patrick:** My whole thing of wanting to get you to Schitt’s Creek wasn’t an act of altruism but of selfishness

  


**Today** 2:49 PM

 **Patrick:** David?

  


**Today** 2:51 PM

 **Stevie:** David can’t come to the phone right now 

**Stevie:** he’s crying… again

  


**Today** 2:53 PM

 **Stevie:** is this going to be a recurring thing where you constantly make him cry

  


**Today** 2:55 PM

 **Patrick:** Uhhhh good afternoon to you too Stevie?

  


**Today** 2:57 PM

 **Stevie:** what did you say to him??

  


**Today** 3:00 PM

 **Patrick:** ….Can we get some privacy?

  


**Today** 3:02 PM

 **Stevie:** tough luck buddy

 **Stevie:** this is better than netflix

  


**Today** 3:05 PM

 **Patrick:** At least someone is entertained

  


**Today** 3:18 PM

 **David:** i thought i changed my pin

 **David:** i really need to Stevie-proof my phone

  


**Today** 3:20 PM

 **Patrick:** I’m glad you got the sand out of your eyes

  


**Today** 3:22 PM

 **David:** it would help if you’d stop creating sandstorms around me

  


**Today** 3:24 PM

 **Patrick:** Can’t guarantee anything

  


**Today** 3:26 PM

 **David:** being with you is gonna send me into an early grave

  


**Today** 3:28 PM

 **Patrick:** You’re saying we’re together then?

  


**Today** 3:34 PM

 **David:** oh my god i can’t stand Stevie

  


**Today** 3:36 PM

 **Patrick:** What did she say?

  


**Today** 3:38 PM

 **David:** i’m not gonna repeat it

 **David:** i’m off to have my late lunch

  


**Today** 3:40 PM

 **Patrick:** So stingy

  


**Today** 4:51 PM

 **David:** it’s close to 5 now

 **David:** i guess heading out is kind of pointless?

  


**Today** 4:55 PM

 **Patrick:** Yeah it is

  


**Patrick:** You should stay for another day, enjoy it there

  


**Today** 5:20 PM

 **David:** Stevie has a black hole for a stomach

  


**Today** 5:23 PM

 **David:** how does a woman so small have such a big appetite

  


**Today** 5:26 PM

 **David:** so what have you been doing for the whole day?

  


**Today** 5:28 PM

 **Patrick:** Nothing, literally

  


**Patrick:** Other than texting you

 **Patrick:** Ronnie still insists that I stay in bed

 **Patrick:** I even got my meals brought to me, which was a bit of an overkill but sweet

  


**Today** 5:30 PM

 **David:** i’m the one in a hotel yet you’re the one getting room service?

 **David:** what has this world come to

  


**Today** 5:33 PM

 **Patrick:** IMG_2020060104.jpg

  


**Patrick:** This was my lunch

 **Patrick:** Don’t tell me you had ramen again

  


**Today** 5:36 PM

 **David:** actually

 **David:** we looked up tutorials on how to make steak

 **David:** overcooked a few but we finally managed to succeed

  


**Today** 5:38 PM

 **Patrick:** Congrats on the steak

 **Patrick:** Speaking of, here comes my dinner

  


**Today** 5:41 PM

 **Patrick:** I’d love to keep talking to you but my friends are here to visit

 **Patrick:** They’re keeping me company

 **Patrick:** In case I get bored, haha

  


**Today** 5:43 PM

 **David:** go enjoy their company

 **David:** i got company to entertain too

  


**Today** 8:23 PM

 **Stevie:** so lover boy here is currently doing the absolute most with his skin care routine

  


**Today** 8:26 PM

 **Patrick:** Hi Stevie

  


**Today** 8:28 PM

 **Patrick:** Doesn’t he always spend a lot of time on his skin?

 **Patrick:** It’s not out of the ordinary

  


**Today** 8:30 PM

 **Stevie:** Patrick you’re not getting it

 **Stevie:** he’s doing the *most*

 **Stevie:** /extreme/

 **Stevie:** trying to look good for some stupid guy he’s about to meet tomorrow apparently

  


**Today** 8:32 PM

 **Patrick:** Oh

  


**Today** 8:34 PM

 **Stevie:** who even goes on grindr during the apocalypse

 **Stevie:** so desperate

  


**Today** 8:36 PM

 **Stevie:** i’m going to take a picture of him with his dumb face mask and ruin the surprise

  


**Today** 8:38 PM

 **Patrick:** Could you uh

  


**Patrick:** Give David his phone back

  


**Today** 8:42 PM

 **Stevie:** you two are disgusting

  


**Today** 8:45 PM

 **Patrick:** I know we’re revolting thanks

  


**Today** 8:50 PM

 **Stevie:** you know what i’m gonnahgjh.j iue.,wyrk hgajs

  


**Today** 9:00 PM

 **David:** HOW many times is she going to hijack my phone holy S H I T

  


**Today** 9:04 PM

 **Patrick:** Hey

  


**Patrick:** Maybe you shouldn’t leave it unattended when you’re doing your face mask

 **Patrick:** Just a suggestion

  


**Today** 9:06 PM

 **David:** why the hell do i even like the two of you so much

  


**Today** 9:08 PM

 **Patrick:** Oh you like me?

  


**Today** 9:12 PM

 **David:** no i hate you the most actually :)))

  


**Today** 9:14 PM

 **Patrick:** I’m flattered

  


**Today** 9:17 PM

 **Patrick:** You really don’t have to go out of your way for me

 **Patrick:** God knows I look like a wreck

  


**Today** 9:21 PM

 **David:** who said i’m looking good for you

 **David:** i have a whole town to greet so i want to look my best ok

 **David:** also if you consider looking handsomely rugged a wreck then i’ll take it

  


**Today** 9:24 PM

 **Patrick:** What if you come across a horde on your way over

 **Patrick:** You know they’re starving for your highly moisturized skin

  


**Today** 9:26 PM

 **David:** then prepare to be greeted by a zombie with flawless skin

 **David:** and his tiny country goth minion

  


**Today** 9:28 PM

 **Patrick:** I hope Stevie didn’t see that you called her your tiny minion

  


**Today** 9:32 PM

 **David:** OW

 **David:** FUCK

  


**Today** 9:34 PM

 **David:** SOMEONE lacks a sense of humor jfc

 **David:** i’m definitely going to find a bruise on my arm tomorrow

  


**Today** 9:37 PM

 **Patrick:** You two are such a riot

 **Patrick:** Can’t wait to see both of you in person

  


**Today** 9:39 PM

 **David:** you’ll get to witness for yourself how much of a menace she is

  


**Today** 9:48 PM

 **David:** i shoved her in the pool

  


**Today** 9:56 PM

 **David:** she’s gonna take a bath now

 **David:** we finally get some alone time

  


**Today** 10:02 PM

 **Patrick:** Why didn’t you go with Mutt and Tennessee?

 **Patrick:** They sound like good people

  


**Today** 10:06 PM

 **David:** whoa what's with the serious tone all of a sudden?

 **David:** but yeah they are

 **David:** if i went with them i wouldn’t have met Stevie

  


**Today** 10:09 PM

 **Patrick:** I was just wondering

 **Patrick:** Figured we know each other well enough now to be candid

  


**Today** 10:11 PM

 **Patrick:** So you didn’t tell them about SC?

 **Patrick:** I’m sure they would’ve taken you here

  


**Today** 10:13 PM

 **David:** i need a drink if we’re gonna have this conversation

  


**Today** 10:15 PM

 **Patrick:** Okay? 

  


**Today** 10:26 PM

 **David:** do you like red wine or white wine

 **David:** wait i think you said you’re a beer person

  


**Today** 10:28 PM

 **Patrick:** Yeah I’m a beer person but I also love red wine

  


**Today** 10:31 PM

 **Patrick:** David why are you avoiding this conversation

  


**Today** 10:34 PM

 **David:** i’m not

 **David:** just thought about alcohol preferences and wanted to ask

  


**Today** 10:36 PM

 **Patrick:** David

  


**Today** 10:40 PM

 **David:** IMG_2020060134.jpg

 **David:** i love this view of the night sky reflecting off of the pool

  


**Today** 10:42 PM

 **Patrick:** Why did you insist on coming to Schitt’s Creek when Mutt and Tennessee offered for you to stay with them?

 **Patrick:** For two days you thought I was dead

 **Patrick:** Apparently you didn’t tell them about Schitt’s Creek

 **Patrick:** Why didn’t you?

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Patrick:** Help me understand

  


**Today** 10:46 PM

 **David:** what is there to understand

 **David:** i just didn’t feel like telling them

  


**Today** 10:48 PM

 **Patrick:** So you were just planning to make the trek up here on your own?

  


**Today** 10:51 PM

 **David:** is it that hard to believe

  


**Today** 10:54 PM

 **Patrick:** What were you planning on doing if you got here and I was dead

 **Patrick:** Or if Schitt’s Creek was somehow gone?

  


**Today** 10:57 PM

 **Patrick:** What I can’t believe is that you’d give up the safety and company of Mutt’s group

 **Patrick:** And risk your life to come to a place that you weren’t even certain still existed

 **Patrick:** That’s incredibly stupid of you

  


**Today** 11:01 PM

 **David:** BECAUSE I WANTED TO BE WITH YOU OKAY?

 **David:** dead or alive

  


**Today** 11:06 PM

 **David:** after you stopped responding

 **David:** my mind jumped to the worst case scenario

 **David:** and i couldn’t live with that

  


**Today** 11:09 PM

 **David:** i didn’t know what else to do

 **David:** at that point i honestly didn’t care if i lived or not

 **David:** i just wanted to keep my promise and make it to you

 **David:** Mutt would’ve insisted that i stay with them if you weren’t there

 **David:** and yeah, what if Schitt’s Creek had been taken over by those rioters that night?

 **David:** i would be leading them into danger

  


**Today** 11:12 PM

 **David:** what do you want me to say Patrick

 **David:** yes i was being selfish

 **David:** i didn’t tell Mutt where i was going because i wasn’t planning on living if you weren’t there anymore

  


**Today** 11:15 PM

 **David:** i told you i’m a very intense person to be with

 **David:** are you regretting ever knowing me now?

  


**Today** 11:18 PM

 **Patrick:** I can’t

  


**Today** 11:20 PM

 **David:** yeah

 **David:** i figured

  


**Today** 11:24 PM

 **Patrick:** Shaking too much to type

  


**Patrick:** Give me a min

  


**Today** 11:26 PM

 **Patrick:** I really want to hug you right now

  


**Today** 11:28 PM

 **Patrick:** I need you to know that you're worth so much more than you think

 **Patrick:** I'll spend the rest of my days proving to you how important you are

  


**Today** 11:30 PM

 **David:** you’re okay with all this?

  


**Today** 11:32 PM

 **Patrick:** If anything

 **Patrick:** You’ve just made me even more certain that I want to be with you

 **Patrick:** I really can’t wait to see you

  


**Today** 11:37 PM

 **David:** Ugh Stevie’s trying to unlock my door

 **David:** Gotta go

  


**Today** 11:39 PM

 **David:** I can’t wait to see you too

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Final stretch!!!! One more chapter ;D
> 
> Hope you all have enjoyed yourselves so far~


	21. June 2 2020

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Do you want me to hand you a rose when you arrive?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for posting late! Had a really hectic start of the week and completely got Tuesday mixed with Monday lmao (what are timezones am I right?).

**4:00 PM** **81%**

**⟨**

Patrick ⟩

**Today** 5:20 AM

 **David:** a very early good morning to you

 **David:** we both couldn’t sleep

 **David:** got too excited

  


**Today** 5:29 AM

 **David:** so yesterday i had to put my phone in my pocket to keep it out of Stevie’s reach

 **David:** i can’t have her reading all that

  


**Today** 5:36 AM

 **David:** we ended up watching reruns of The Bachelor and giving very colorful commentary

 **David:** Stevie made some stupid joke about you with a rose when we arrive at SC

 **David:** so stupid

  


**Today** 5:39 AM

 **David:** we slept a little on the couch and tried going to bed 

**David:** but she came into my room and asked if i wanted to leave early

  


**Today** 5:42 AM

 **David:** so here we are eating breakfast

  


**Today** 7:04 AM

 **Patrick:** Oh good morning

 **Patrick:** My turn to have a good nights sleep

  


**Today** 7:06 AM

 **David:** good

  


**Today** 7:08 AM

 **Patrick:** Do you want me to hand you a rose when you arrive?

 **Patrick:** Or are you more of a bouquet person?

  


**Today** 7:13 AM

 **David:** ew

 **David:** don’t you dare

 **David:** people have made fun of my family name for ages re: roses

 **David:** so sick of them

  


**Today** 7:16 AM

 **Patrick:** Back in school, people thought my family owned a brewery because of our last name

 **Patrick:** I get it

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Patrick:** Though I really do like beer

  


**Today** 7:18 AM

 **David:** well i don’t particularly like rosé

 **David:** but i’ll still drink it if there’s nothing else

  


**Today** 7:25 AM

 **David:** Stevie suggested we try looking for a car to drive

  


**Today** 7:27 AM

 **Patrick:** Smart

  


**Patrick:** I’d advise that you look for an SUV

 **Patrick:** Sedans don’t fare so well

  


**Today** 7:30 AM

 **David:** aww i was looking forward to driving a Porsche convertible

 **David:** what’s the point traffic-free roads if we can’t speed down the highway?

  


**Today** 7:32 AM

 **Patrick:** It might be traffic-free and no speed limits

 **Patrick:** But there are plenty of obstacles along the way

  


**Today** 7:25 AM

 **David:** mmm i know i saw the road conditions while i was walking

 **David:** but still

 **David:** you’re no fun

  


**Today** 8:54 AM

 **David:** how’s this for practical?

 **David:** IMG_2020060212.jpg

 **David:** this Land Rover is packed

 **David:** IMG_2020060220.jpg

  


**Today** 8:57 AM

 **Patrick:** Are those cases of alcohol?

  


**Today** 9:01 AM

 **David:** we can’t arrive in Schitt’s Creek empty handed now could we?

  


**Today** 9:08 AM

 **David:** alright we’re off

  


**Today** 9:12 AM

 **Patrick:** Drive carefully!

 **Patrick:** Be prepared to take several detours and swerving around objects

  


**Today** 9:14 AM

 **David:** oh i won’t be driving

 **David:** at first

  


**Today** 9:17 AM

 **David:** lol Stevie said she doesn’t trust me behind the wheel

 **David:** as if she’s a better driver

  


**Today** 9:34 AM

 **David:** IMG_2020060227.jpg

 **David:** bye Toronto

 **David:** you were a good host

  


**Today** 10:24 AM

 **David:** so Stevie here is telling me that Jake is quite the charmer

 **David:** apparently she kissed him too?

 **David:** done more than that, in fact

  


**Today** 10:27 AM

 **Patrick:** You told her about Jake?

  


**Today** 10:29 AM

 **David:** you know i wouldn’t share stuff like that

 **David:** she read what you wrote before, remember

 **David:** much to my dismay

  


**Today** 10:31 AM

 **Patrick:** You really need to Stevie-proof your phone

  


**Today** 10:33 AM

 **David:** you’re telling me?

  


**Today** 10:35 AM

 **Patrick:** Well, Jake’s pretty open about that sort of stuff actually

  


**Today** 10:37 AM

 **David:** really

 **David:** so when i arrive would i be the only person around our age who hasn’t kissed him?

  


**Today** 10:40 AM

 **Patrick:** You want to kiss him?

  


**Today** 10:42 AM

 **David:** i dunno

 **David:** perhaps i should seek him out

 **David:** see for myself if he’s as great as they say

  


**Today** 10:44 AM

 **Patrick:** You can do that, I guess

  


**Today** 10:46 AM

 **David:** you don’t mind?

  


**Today** 10:48 AM

 **Patrick:** Should I mind?

  


**Today** 10:51 AM

 **David:** i’d like you to mind, a little

 **David:** plus i had someone else in mind i wanted to kiss anyway

  


**Today** 10:54 AM

 **Patrick:** Oh really?

 **Patrick:** I hope this person knows how lucky they are

  


**Today** 10:56 AM

 **David:** oh i hope he does too

  


**Today** 11:00 AM

 **David:** Stevie is gagging

 **David:** i swear to god this woman!

 **David:** pay attention to the road and not my phone

  


**Today** 11:47 AM

 **David:** what are you up to today?

  


**Today** 11:50 AM

 **Patrick:** Just going in for a check up

 **Patrick:** Got a clean bill of health

 **Patrick:** In fairly good shape to see you, I think

  


**Today** 11:52 AM

 **Patrick:** Ronnie still wants me to take it easy though

 **Patrick:** I think I’ll go and help them out with lunch

 **Patrick:** Where are you guys?

  


**Today** 11:56 AM

 **David:** i think we’re two hours out of Toronto?

 **David:** we did do a lot of detours by getting on and off of the highway

 **David:** a lot of abandoned cars blocking the way out of the city

  


**Today** 12:01 PM

 **David:** it’s clearing up a little now

  


**Today** 12:13 PM

 **David:** we’re stopping for a light lunch

 **David:** the weather is super nice today

  


**Today** 12:18 PM

 **Patrick:** I hear we’re having pizza for dinner today

 **Patrick:** Since Pizza Friday got interrupted last week

 **Patrick:** Make sure you don’t let Stevie drive too fast

  


**Today** 12:20 PM

 **David:** oh you know i’m gonna make her book it now

 **David:** this is definitely making up for the fact that we’re polishing off the chewy cardboard

  


**Today** 12:22 PM

 **Patrick:** Don’t worry, we still have plenty of that in stock if you ever miss the texture and flavor

  


**Today** 12:24 PM

 **David:** gross

 **David:** no thanks

  


**Today** 12:30 PM

 **Patrick:** I’m off to go help them with lunch

 **Patrick:** I’ll talk to you later?

  


**Today** 12:32 PM

 **David:** yeah sure

 **David:** don’t overexert yourself though

  


**Today** 12:34 PM

 **Patrick:** I like when you worry about me

  


**Today** 12:36 PM

 **David:** savor it i don’t normally care about people this much

  


**Today** 1:11 PM

 **David:** oh btw i texted Mutt

 **David:** told him i’m heading to Schitt’s Creek

 **David:** they’re doing pretty well right now

 **David:** they’re currently at some wildlife reserve place

  


**Today** 1:14 PM

 **Patrick:** Sounds nice

 **Patrick:** Though if they ever get tired of travelling

 **Patrick:** They’re always welcome to come to SC

  


**Today** 1:16 PM

 **David:** that’s kind of you to offer

 **David:** i’ll tell them that

  


**Today** 1:18 PM

 **Patrick:** I’d love to thank him in person for helping you out

 **Patrick:** And being there for you when I couldn’t be

  


**Today** 1:23 PM

 **Stevie:** whY DON’T YOU JUST MARRY HIM YOUJFGEUYRFHDRGFHD

  


**Today** 1:26 PM

 **David:** JESUS FUCK

 **David:** she let go of the fucking wheel and scared the living shit out of me just to steal my phone to say that????????????

 **David:** holy shit

  


**Today** 1:28 PM

 **David:** she’s gonna crash this car and kill the both of us in it before we get anywhere remotely close to SC

  


**Today** 1:32 PM

 **Patrick:** Please tell her to be more careful

 **Patrick:** She can make fun of us all she wants when you get here but don’t do it now

 **Patrick:** I’d like for you to arrive intact

  


**Today** 1:34 PM

 **David:** i was gonna offer to swap driving duties but now i’m scared of what she’ll do with my phone

  


**Today** 1:36 PM

 **Patrick:** Best if you don’t

 **David:** i’m not going to now lmao

  


**Today** 1:51 PM

 **Patrick:** I brought Stevie up with Jake during breakfast

 **Patrick:** She’s wrong about no one missing her

 **Patrick:** He’s actually happy to hear she’s okay and he can’t wait to see her

  


**Today** 1:54 PM

 **David:** Stevie refuses to look at me right now

 **David:** omfg thank you for that ammo

  


**Today** 1:56 PM

 **Patrick:** Oh you know I don’t disappoint

  


**Today** 1:58 PM

 **David:** i’m loving this

  


**Today** 2:10 PM

 **David:** i’m gonna take a nap

 **David:** i’m tucking my phone in my back pocket

 **David:** you know, for safe keeping

  


**Today** 2:12 PM

 **Patrick:** I guess your butt has Stevie-proof duties now 

  


**Today** 2:14 PM

 **David:** you did not just make a butt joke

 **David:** wow

  


**Today** 2:16 PM

 **Patrick:** 😉

  


**Today** 3:14 PM

 **David:** oh no

 **David:** i think… i think we ran out of gas

 **David:** we did not think this through

 **David:** what do we do

 **David:** we’re stuck in the middle of nowhere

  


**Today** 3:16 PM

 **Patrick:** Don’t worry it’s going to be fine

  


**Today** 3:18 PM

 **David:** what do you mean it’s going to be fine?

  


**Today** 3:24 PM

 **David:** uhhh Patrick

 **David:** there’s a convoy coming towards us??

 **David:** i think they’re all Jeeps

 **David:** i can’t possibly be that lucky that it’d be another friendly group like Mutt’s

 **David:** it’s got to be a rouge group right?

 **David:** Stevie and i are freaking the fuck out

  


**Today** 3:26 PM

 **Patrick:** David, calm down

 **David:** why are you telling me to calm down???

 **David:** how can i possibly remain calm in this situation

  


**Today** 3:28 PM

 **David:** FUCKKKK WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO ME

 **David:** WE LOCKED OUR DOORS

 **David:** STEVIE’S CLIMBING INTO THE BACK TO SEE IF WE HAVE A CROWBAR

 **David:** OR WHATEVER WE CAN USE TO DEFEND OURSELVES

  


**Today** 3:30 PM

 **David:** THEY’RE GETTING REALLY CLOSE NOW

  


**Today** 3:31 PM

 **David:** WHY AREN’T YOU FREAKING OUT

  


**Today** 3:33 PM

 **Patrick:** It’s okay

 **David:** IT’S REALLY NOT

  


**Today** 3:35 PM

 **David:** OH GOD

 **David:** THEY’RE HERE

 **David:** THEY STOPPED A FEW FEET AWAY FROM US

  


**Today** 3:37 PM

 **David:** A GUY JUST GOT OUT OF THE FIRST CAR

 **David:** ……

 **David:** WHY IS HE JUST STANDING THERE

  


**Today** 3:38 PM

 **David:** WHY IS HE SMILING AT OUR CAR

 **David:** I’M SCARED

  


**Today** 3:39 PM

 **David:** HE’S CHECKING HIS PHONE?????

  


**Today** 3:41 PM

 **Patrick:** Is the guy good looking?

 **David:**??????????????????

  


**Today** 3:43 PM

 **Patrick:** Is he wearing an olive utility vest over a sky blue shirt and jeans?

 **David:**!!!!!!!!!!!

 **David:** HOW DID YOU

  


**Today** 3:47 PM

 **David:** NO

 **David:** WAIT NO NUH UH NO

  


**Today** 3:49 PM

 **Patrick:** Hi David

 **Patrick:** I did promise to come pick you up, didn’t I?

  


**Today** 3:51 PM

 **David:** you’re here

 **David:** oh my god

  


**Today** 3:53 PM

 **Patrick:** I couldn’t wait for you to make it to me

 **Patrick:** So I came to get you

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That concludes "make it to me"!!! My very first WIP multichaptered fic that I've not only posted but also completed? What?!
> 
> Thank you all so much for your support. I really couldn't've done this without my best friend J who held my hand though my doubts and mental breakdowns and writer's blocks and I definitely couldn't've done it without all of your lovely, wonderful messages every update that kept me going <3

**Author's Note:**

> As of April 23: Yes I changed the title, the fic was previously named "i'm sending a message" but it didn't fit the mood of this fic that well.
> 
> Come scream with me on tumblr @rosesdavid about these two.


End file.
